


Fleur de saison

by grainipiot



Series: Hanahaki AU [2]
Category: League of Legends
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Friends to Lovers, Hanahaki Disease, M/M, Mutual Pining, rather angst but happy ending, this will be soft in the end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:55:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 27,826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23420527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grainipiot/pseuds/grainipiot
Summary: The idea was simple: after highschool, Yasuo would join his brother and his friend to share a flat during their studies. It possibly couldn't go wrong. However it didn't take in count the possibility of a crush for his dear friend and with that, the first signs of pain.Modern AU - yisuo - hanahaki
Relationships: Yasuo/Master Yi (League of Legends)
Series: Hanahaki AU [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1757704
Comments: 113
Kudos: 33





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!  
> Yes, another AU! This one isn't meant to last long, hopefully. Merely a quick hanahaki fanfic because I wanted to have some feels and angst. This is the most self indulgent fic in this trope, a good part of pining, angst and hurt/comfort. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Life could be worse.

That was what Yasuo thought from time to time, when indeed he felt like crap. Like right now. How bad ? Definitely it could be better but again he was sure he didn’t have it too bad. That was what it meant to have a crush. A stupid, increasing, bothering crush on his roommate.

From this point there were two sides. The good side was that he had the simple joy of seeing his love every day at least once if not more. The bad side was that it reminded him how close he was of something he couldn’t hope to have.

This was his life, reduced to his crush over his highschool friend. It wasn’t exactly old. All sort of started but not really when Yasuo had arrived in highschool. Being a bit lost like the teen he was, he stayed along his brother in the first months the time to get used to the place, because Yone had been here for already a year. This was how he met Yi, Yone’s classmate and one of his dear friends. If he got to know him better, it was because Yasuo still remained with them during breaks and else, making it a rather peculiar trio.

No, this wasn’t really the beginning, merely an introduction to a future disaster. Time in highschool was great, Yasuo did well even though his behavior and attitude sometimes got him into troubles. This didn’t stop him from passing his exams in any case, he wasn’t stupid enough to skip that. On the social side, it was also great, he had made friends and managed to be rather popular despite the problems he would run into on occasions. As some said, his heart was in the right place.

Yi was still part of these friends, to his surprise. Even when Yone wasn’t present to tag along because he had other friends, Yi would still tolerate him. It was nice and Yasuo was glad to see him stay even as time went. At this time he simply thought of him as a very dear friend, maybe best friend if Yi would confirm. There were no ‘real’ feelings yet but everything was more than fine.

The last year of highschool was a bit more sad. He wasn’t exactly alone but both Yone and Yi had finished their time here so they had left to study. Long year for Yasuo but there was still something to look forward to.

Before their exams, his brother and his dear friend had been talking about what studies to do then, like everyone their age. It turned out both wanted to go study in another city so they did what was possible, which was renting a place as roommates. At that time Yasuo had been curiously listening, a bit sad to see that they would leave him alone – even as is wasn’t their fault specifically – and furthermore share a flat. All this had sounded so fun so he joked about joining them next year.

It happened.

What had started as a joke – to hide honest intentions – slowly led to plans for the following year. It was even discussed before Yi and Yone had left for their new city, during summer. At the same time and against what Yasuo expected, they still stayed in touch after that. Yone often came back home the time of a weekend because he knew their mother would like that but even considering that, they still talked and chatted regularly.

That way he followed their separate studies, what they did in university and how life was in this other city. It distracted him from his lingering loneliness in highschool. Strange time but it was alright.

Week by week, month by month he could just count until he would do his exams and be free of this crap. Possibly it even motivated him to do well, so he could rightfully ask the studies that interested him, which included joining his brother and friend. All planned.

Their mother let him do, even if it was harsh not to have her two sons home anymore. They swore they would pay a visit when they could, plus the already settled holidays and vacations.

Exams were done, he had passed without much difficulties and now he could return to this happy group they had formed before. All would go well, he hoped. No problem at all because he had literally spent all his life with Yone around, this wasn’t going to be challenging. Yi was so chill, he never feared anything bad would happen. If there was an issue, Yasuo was the most likely to be the origin. They all agreed.

To be sure, the two classmates had spent the university year looking for another place to rent, since they would be three and not just two, which wasn’t possible where they lived. It had been a bit tricky to find but they did it, with some help from Yi’s family that was very welcome.

So they were three, sharing a rather small but comfortable flat. Life could start for Yasuo.

It was good, he was at last considered an adult and dree to have a social life like any other student. So he went out, a lot. And then next morning was difficult and he still worked hard for his studies. This was a time to try and fail, he could still learn so he did.

The only thing he had underestimated was life with two roommates. With Yone it was fine, he knew his brother for nearly two decades. Yi, on the other hand. Not in a bad way, of course. But Yasuo didn’t know what he had signed up for.

When he arrived and moved in, it was clear the other two already had a few habits and routine abotu life with a roommate. And so he learned little by little how Yi was as private than during highschool, going on his peaceful day. Far to be a bother. No this wasn’t what struck Yasuo.

Now he saw his dear friend every day, morning and evening. Something he couldn’t have seen before, this quiet side of Yi as he spent his time on the couch. Or when he got out of the bathroom after a shower. That was definitely what struck Yasuo, without reason. Besides that point of seeing a close friend in daily life, with its moods and joys, there was the slow feeling of becoming part of the trio again. Yone knocking at his door when his alarm couldn’t wake him up, Yi having already made coffee before he left for his own classes, Yasuo being an absolute mess in the morning. The dynamic didn’t seem to have changed at all and again it felt like home.

Go back home, see who was already back, bake something or make dinner, have dinner, watch a movie. Many things involved the other two and Yasuo was so glad ot have that again. Until he realized he started to feel more about his friend. Barely a few months into living with roommates, he had already caught some feelings for Yi.

Well, he went on. This wasn’t going anywhere, since the latter didn’t even seem to be interested in anyone. Yasuo wasn’t exactly a coward but there was this specific fear about asking such a thing to Yi, he couldn’t explain why he felt this way around his friend. Anyway, it didn’t matter, he wasn’t planning on telling him. If it was just a crush indeed then it would be gonne in a month or two.

He hoped.

Life could be worse, he used to think. Until these feelings took the shape of a very physical ache. Simply a cough and a few petals in his palm that felt too heavy of meaning.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!  
> let's get this going~
> 
> thank you for reading!!

_Oh fuck no_.

Yasuo couldn’t believe it. Yet there was the physical proof right there, in his hand. Three petals, all white except for some light green. No idea what kind of flower and anyway it didn’t matter as much in this moment. What made him freak out was the meaning behind all this.

This disease was rather rare but not enough to be unknown. A few cases there and there and word running about what happened when someone got it. A disease about unrequited love. This was all it meant and Yasuo wasn’t ready for this.

_But…_

Life really was unfair sometimes. His thoughts raced uselessly, there was nothing that made sense for him to be in so much troubles. Yasuo simply sat there, on the floor of his bedroom, gaze stuck on this dreaded first sign of a much worse issue.

If only it could just be a small cough and that was it. Sadly, it wasn’t the case and he was too aware. This wasn’t going to stop, he would get more sick, cough a lot more until one day his body wouldn’t be able to endure more. His blood turned cold at the mere thought. _Why me… ?_ It was so horrible, he just wanted to live quietly and enjoy his youth as much as he could.

To ask the question was also stupid because he knew very well why this special disease took. All this because of his dumb feelings. All this crap wouldn’t happen to him if he wasn’t glancing so often at his friend. Now he was stuck with a start of hanahaki and he could as well consider this case closed.

Bitterness and sadness overwhelmed him, still considering the incriminated petals. This wouldn’t possibly end well, it was called a crush for good reasons. So from the start Yasuo knew he had no chances in an unhoped for confession. This couldn’t happen, as simple as that. For the several months spent living all together as roommates, he did know well that Yi had no interest in anyone. God knew, maybe ace or else. This topic had come up a few times during highschool and later but all Yasuo remembered was the lack of answers and the mystery lingering around it. As time went he had less courage to ask more precisely, especially because the feelings got in the way meanwhile. He wouldn’t make it out of such conversation without problems.

_No, can’t ask him. Can’t tell him_. This was a big no. Usually he wouldn’t back off at the smallest risk but this was the only topic that he didn’t want to wander on, along the one of his birth. No matter what he imagined, there was no realistic outcome for him if he was to confess. This crush was his own problem, no need to involve anyone one in that. Even if he was going to hurt over this.

It broke his heart a little. Really, couldn’t it chose someone else to bother ? These feelings weren’t supposed to be strong or anything. _Why… ?_ Yasuo hated all that it implied because it forced him to face what had been going on. This disease wouldn’t happen where it was useless, there had to be serious feelings and enough pain behind it. _No. Please, no_.

This urge to deny everything came up, vicious. It was horrible because Yasuo was too aware of what had to happen in the end. Either slow death for unrequited feelings or these same feelings taken from him. Only that way he would survive it. By being taken away the very reason of this disease. He didn’t want that neither from a first glance. Who knew ? Maybe later he would come in term with that solution but so far it didn’t sit well to imagine daily life without feeling anything for someone. Feelings that used to be there. His heart bled in advance.

The last solution wasn’t even possible. Yasuo didn’t try to hurt himself by having hopes and thinking about it. How many chances to have a dear friend and roommate come out of his way to confess unheard feelings from nowhere ? Zero. That was easy, no need to imagine an outcome that didn’t exist.

All this was useless.

A bit numb, if anything, Yasuo stayed in his bedroom. What could he do right now ? There was nothing that came to his mind except pent-up sadness and an urge to scream. Life was cruel sometimes and no matter how many craps he had done, he didn’t think he deserved this. Even less Yi.

Fear came back, hyperaware. On reflex Yasuo looked around, to the closed door. Hopefully privacy was one of the main rules between them, no one would barge in his room without knocking. Still, he stood in a second and searched for a place to hide the petals. _They can’t hear of it_. This would be such disaster. Yone would be so worried and maybe Yi a little. No idea how he would react if he guessed or found out about the reason. _Nope_. This was why Yasuo went through half of his bedroom to find a good hiding spot or naything. To simply throw it in the trash would be stupid, they had no reasons to have flowers here.

In last resort he simply kept it in a tissue, folded with care as if scared of the meaning of this. Panick could decrease a little, for now. Next day Yasuo would throw it away between classes, that way the other two would have no idea what happened.

_But what then ?_

No idea and he couldn’t afford to think about it, not right now. It was the evening, a stupid wednesday evening after dinner and Yasuo couldn’t even dare to imagine how his life would go from there. No way to just go in the living room find his bro and friend to announce that he was maybe a bit dying little by little. A disaster.

For now he would hide all this and keep it for himself. It was sickening, he had no idea how long this was going to take, if he had any chances to delay it or not. If he was simply going to survive.

_Don’t think about it._

Maybe with some luck he would just wake up on early thursday morning and realize what a crappy nightmare this was. Yet reality seemed a bit too convincing. For a time he sat in bed, paying attention to his breathing as if it was going to kill him on the spot. This wasn’t supposed to go like this and he knew it but the fear remained. There was no sign of any issue, no hitch or anything. Then he lost his mind shortly on that.

_Stop stop stop…_

The last question was if anxiety would kill him before the disease could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this will definitely be shorter than my other series but still gonna dig into angst :3


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!  
> another update! i'll maybe change a little my cycle, because i'd really love to spam this fic until completion xD
> 
> thank you for reading!!

It wasn’t a nightmare. Or maybe was it in fact ? In any case Yasuo woke up on this thursday morning, feeling so anxious. _Oh no…_

It was real, of course it was. He cut the alarm and got up, looking into his stuff. Then he found it. A tissue folded with care, hiding three poor petals. Dread shook him violently, twisting in his chest. _It’s real…_ Standing there without goal, Yasuo left fear overwhelm him. It was sickening to live that again, to know that he could potentially die for something stupid. Yet it was true, he had the proof right there, in a tissue.

_Don’t panick, for fuck sake._ It would only make everything more difficult and the other two would notice there was something wrong with him. This was to be prevented no matter the cost.

With more worry he closed the tissue and kept it safely in his bag, to be thrown away later. No way to let that to be found here, even if by principle no one would snoop around in his bedroom. They trusted each other but really Yasuo couldn’t be more cautious. At the mere idea of being found out, his blood turned cold. _No_.

Now he paced a little in his bedroom, thoughts racing about what he should do, if there was any detail to hide. After maybe few minutes at the limit of going crazy, Yasuo tried to relax, even just a little. It was important to seem normal, not to worry his brother and friend. They always said he was too obvious, that he couldn’t hide something for too long but right now he wished he could seem as blank as Yi when asked personal question.

A deep breath, then he got out to join whoever was taking his breakfast in the kitchen. It was time to be convincing.

~

At first it didn’t seem so bad. The first day went rather well, even though the threat looming nearby had a biggest impact on Yasuo than the disease itself. He stayed aware of any sign, anything that would betray his condition but nothing came. If he didn’t have these white and green petals in his hand he would almost believe he dreamed that evening. After some time he managed to get it away at last, not without a last glance behind as if everyone around had guessed what he just did. Soon it would be paranoia.

For a time he thought that the disease was quite long to really impact him. That this was simply a first scare. Sadly he got another small fit of coughing by the end of the day. Yasuo just had the time to go to the bathroom at his university as soon as he realized there was indeed a few new petals. And so started again anxiety and deep fear about hanahaki. It seemed to never leave him at peace.

After throwing it away with too many precautions, Yasuo headed back home, heart heavy in fear of any fit once he got there. This would be the worst truly but so far he was blessed with respite.

The thing was, he wasn’t really prepared to just see Yi like every day, now aware that what he thought to be a crush was surely stronger than that. Yasuo’s day of classes was over but so started another round of constant fear. What he dreaded most was to cough during dinner, since they wer all present at that moment. It would be the worst because it was too exposed and unless he had a good reflex, he couldn’t escape. Maybe if he pretended to run to the bathroom to throw up but he wasn’t sure.

This was so stupid and he hated to have to think about it every minute, every second. It could always happen, even though so far it only occurred twice in less than twenty-four. Now doubt he would go mad about this at some point. Yasuo never did so well under pressure, especially now that he risked to out himself if anything went wrong while he was in company of his roommates.

Each interaction made him feel a bit crazy, trapped. Sometimes he felt like Yone was staring at him, already aware of an issue but in fact he was simply playing around like before. This was exactly what Yasuo didn’t need, aside glancing far too often at Yi. How could he act normal if the smallest thing made him scared ?

When night time arrived, he struggled to fall asleep again. At the same time, it was understandable. He was counting his days until a potential death. Since he was far too awake, he went on the internet to find more information. As if it was a good idea to check that before sleep, knowing that he wouldn’t find a miracle solution and in the end he would just be scared.

It happened and it didn’t help him at all. Sure he got some information that could be true – to be checked – but if any of it was true then he was fucked. Between a month and half a year, slow agony as time would go, dangerous cough. Many things he didn’t want and it seemed that he was already doomed.

So it left Yasuo right there, scared and alone in bed as sleep had given up on him. It was horrible to think about what was going to happen with time, that he was going to fall more and more sick until he wouldn’t be able to properly function. He could die. So to say he was so scared in this moment, painfully hyperaware of any trouble to breathe.

On the other hand he thought about Yi. This was the reason of everything, his feelings. Yasuo had heard about the solution of removing these same feelings but he thought again about his dear friend and it hurt so much. Could he ever live knowing that this part was gone ? Imagine getting up in the morning and not feeling anything when he saw Yi already having his breakfast, grinning softly as soon as he saw him. Imagine not feeling anything whenever he came back a bit drunk and Yi would be a little compassionate and help him as he could. Imagine. This was too much for him, he had barely a day to think about all this meant for him and to be forced to admit this crush was more powerful than expected. Life was cruel to push everything on him, he didn’t deserve this. And yet here he was, overthinking at the limit of giving up.

This was the first day. What would happen later ?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> no doubt tomorrow i'll write more on it!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey!  
> yes, double update, i want to get to the end but the path is long T__T
> 
> thanks for reading!!

_Snowdrops_.

Now Yasuo had a name for these small flowers he would cough from time to time. It didn’t happen often, hopefully, it seemed he was still in the early stage of the disease. It had taken him some time before he found at last what kind of flower were those he got.

These were all white, except for a small green part. It looked a like like a bell, a very fantasy like bell. Something far too unknown from him to guess at first sight and even to find a meaning in it. People were dumb, they thought the flower had a specif meaning, a reason to be this one and not another one. Yasuo thought it was a lot of bullshit, snowdrops were indeed quite beautiful but it didn’t have a lot to say about this useless crush. If he could still call it one.

By now a whole week has gone and there was no real change in his condition. Yasuo still felt rather normal and healthy, except for the coughing a few rare times. At most once a day. On the other hand he was still so worried because he knew this wouldn’t end well, not without making a move or taking a risk.

A few times Yi and Yone had notice separately that he was coughing. For now only Yone said something and it was mostly a joke with honest question behind it. Yasuo simply answered there was no problem, just a cough indeed. No more questions asked, after all it couldn’t be so serious. They thought.

More and more Yasuo thought about seeing a doctor. It made him so frightened just to iamgine going because at the same time it would help him to recover and find the good solution but it would also mean finding answers he didn’t want. This was about his life. The disease was like a ticking bomb, no way to know exactly when it would explode but its presence remained, overwhelming.

Every time he thought he would be fine, there was another rush of anxiety. None of it was pleasant, far from it. Somewhen it would grow worse, more flowers, blood, until he couldn’t get up anymore. How could he go to sleep peacefully each night knowing in some time he would be doomed ? Yasuo couldn’t relax anymore.

And then there was Yi, always there as their different routines went. Yasuo couldn’t blame his friend for simply existing, that was stupid. Yet every time he saw him, he was reminded of the reason of this shitshow, why he was sick. If only it was requited. But he didn’t want to try and be rejected, which was the only possible outcome.

Days went and every day he saw Yi, his peaceful self, almost every time smiling to him. It was too much for Yasuo’s heart but at the same time he didn’t want to cut that out. To go away and avoid Yi would be as painful as seeing him for their meals, when the three of them talked about their day. It would be much worse.

The more he thought about his dear friend, more it seemed that it was indeed love. Not just a crush. How dumb, because obviously hanahaki wouldn’t happen for mere infatuation. It wasn’t the same anymore than finding himself blushing the few times he caught the view of Yi after his shower. It still happened but with it came feelings, the low yearning of simply being with someone doing nothing. To share contact, to be present, to barely brush each other. Yasuo could still dream about it, the most he got was during their movie nights, when he could easily use the excuse of sharing a blanket on the couch to come closer.

Obviously feelings didn’t come overnight but in his case it had taken enough time and now it blossomed. Yet there was no sunlight to catch, only the disease clouding this possibly bright future. It was sad and surely he would rather have been lovesick and still able to survive. Now it was too late.

The flowers kept coming, yet not too fast. Yasuo barely had seen only one complete flow, all the others were in torn petals, nothing important. The coughing didn’t stop neither. Something not too frequent, like the flowers but it kept him scared to be found out by his roommates. This was going to happen, he knew it. One day or another. Or they would just find him dead one day and discover the reason. No, the disease would bring him down and make it obvious far before the end.

Yasuo hated being paranoid like this, because he had to be. Otherwise he would fail to be discreet and someone else would notice. He didn’t want to be confronted on his feelings, it was fully his, none of their business. Yet he kept going on the internet, too aware that it would worse his anxiety, at the limit of a sort of crisis. It happened once, because he coughed some flowers at the occasion and he swore he was choking. Horrible. That time, he stayed still for so long, tense as he tried to calm down and find a quiet breathing. It still didn’t stop him from going on the internet to read some stories and see what could happen.

When he was at home, hiding the flowers became something critical and he developed a few technics. It was the most important thing not to get found out, especially because this would reveal the whole issue, more than just find that he was sick.

Imposisble to throw it away in the trash can, it could be seen. So he hid it in his stuff until next day, to throw it away as soon as he got far enough. Even with that Yasuo made sure to be alone when he did it, being cautious was important. Always a tissue in his pocket, in case he had to cough and some petals went with it. People would know and force him to realize. Was it wise ? No. It would be better for Yasuo to see a doctor and face the possible outcomes. But he was too scared and breaking routine was a strong no.

So he waited, gnawed slowly by the illness. Until one day Yone found out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh boy, this gonna be hard


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!  
> so a little change about updates! I'll try to alternate one day udpating my cycle of series then one day updating the hanahaki. hopefully it will be over in one or two weeks~
> 
> thank you for reading!

~Yi~

_He’s sick ?_

Yi wasn’t so sure about that, it could be nothing serious. Everyone happened to cough sometimes, this wasn’t shocking. What still caught his attention was that it didn’t go away. No idea when it started but he was sure it had been around a month since Yasuo started to cough so often and there wasn’t a break since. Again, he might be overthinking.

_Maybe it’s nothing_.

Still, it had been some time since he first noticed and as much as he didn’t stayed on it at the beginning, now it might be a bit more serious. It was winter, virus and colds ran in the streets. It was important to pay attention to that. Even though he knew very well that Yasuo was clearly in a specific category. That man was the kind not to get covered enough, at least by everyone’s standards. Always a shirt, no hoodie or anything with long sleeves. At most a jacket if really the weather was bad but in these years since he first knew him, Yi had never seen him act like a normal person and wear a real coat. It was even to the point when last year he had given to him as birthday gift a scarf because he knew Yasuo wouldn’t want to ‘waste’ his money in warm clothing.

Anyway, Yi considered that the latter was now an adult, he could make his own choices and take responsibility when he got sick. Which didn’t happen, until indeed he had first noticed the frequent coughing each day.

_Seems like he can get sick._ If what Yasuo had at the moment was that. 

A few times Yi asked about it because no matter how hypocritical it might be from Yasuo to say that he never got sick until there was the clear proof of the contrary, he still cared about him. No need to add insult to injury, to feel under the weather was crappy enough. Everyone could have low times, no shame to find in that. 

So he did ask and it led nowhere. Each time Yasuo was a bit evasive about it, surely because indeed he didn’t like to admit he caught something. It was nothing to worry about. It just happened once, he wasn’t going after Yi or Yone each time they coughed. That kind of answer. 

Every time Yi had dropped the topic, going back to their routine since obviously everything was fine. The coughing  didn’t stop though. Since Yasuo said it was alright then he simply let it slide for a few days, to notice it wasn’t gone yet. Always the same question and always the same answer. So instead of bothering him further, Yi paid a bit more attention to how his roommate was doing, to see if there were more symptoms like runny nose or anything else. This gave nothing. Yasuo acted like his damn self and except the coughing that he obviously tried to suppress, there was nothing unusual. 

So much for his worry. Indeed a month later it was a bit concerning and Yi hated the idea of a more serious issue. Maybe Yasuo had some allergies that none of them knew about, maybe something else. This wasn’t fun, he was quite worried about it. Who knew ? It could be worse than they thought. Yi decided to keep an eye on all this and maybe convince their idiot roommate to go see a doctor. Possibly he could talk about it with Yone, if there was anything he knew about his brother’s health. Beyond that, he couldn’t do anything, probably it was just some coughing. 

~Yasuo~

_SHIT_

All had been going so well and now it was basically fucked.

Yasuo didn’t make a single move, frozen on his spot, clutching at a handful of petals. It couldn’t be happening right now. Without a doubt Yone got a good view on what just happened, since they were both sitting on the couch at the moment, for their respective activities.

« Yasuo ?? » There it was, slight shock that showed he knew or would soon enough.

It was so dumb, all this time he tried to avoid this exact situation and yet it happened, without a single chance to stop it. He couldn’t move, body so tense in this sudden shock. _Oh no no no…_

« Ah… » Nothing came out, he didn’t know what to say as panick settled. Until one petal fell on his lap, betraying him further. Yasuo tried to catch everything and hid it the best he could, which wasn’t much. « It’s nothing ! »

Horrible, to see realization in his brother’s gaze. Piecing everything together wasn’t difficult, after all the time since Yasuo first knew and the many worried comments from time to time. Now Yone knew, there was nothing to salvage in what he just saw.

« Like hell it’s nothing. Is it…is it for real ? You ?? » Without a pause Yone properly sat up and put his phone away, trying to meet his gaze.

« Hush ! Be quiet ! » Yasuo still made eye contact as he whispered hastily. No way he would let this catch Yi’s attention, in the shower at the moment.

« No ! It’s serious ! » Before he could see it, Yone had come closer and opened his clenched fist that hid the flowers.

_No…_

So Yasuo followed the first reflex and made his brother stay quiet with a bit of strenght. Nothing violent, anyway he wouldn’t last like this for too long but he hoped this was clear enough.

« No really, shut up. Please…I-I can explain… » A few glances in the direction of the bathroom, hopefully the shower was still running so probably no risk.

« You’re sick, I can’t pretend there is nothing ! » Yet Yone seemed to get the message and kept his voice quite low, even if he couldn’t understand the reason.

« I known, I know…just stay quiet, Yi can’t know about this…. »

Surely his gaze told enough, between despair and fear. The latter sat down, still quite alert about this but to know he got the message was good.

« Alright. But you better explain now. »

« Not here. » Without waiting Yasuo got up and looked for any flowers that may have ‘escaped’, taking it back securely. Then he went to his bedroom and obviously that was clear enough as indication for Yone because he followed.

_Fuck…_

Yasuo felt sick, not in the usual meaning related to hanahaki. It was too late, his brother knew and there was no way to get away with it. No doubt Yone would want to know everything, because he still cared about his little brother and this could be potentially deadly. There was only one thing to do and Yasuo still failed.

So to say he was very careful when he closed the door behind Yone, anxiety coiling in his chest like a snake. At that point he wasn’t sure if it was his disease or fear that hurt most. Barely the door closed and already the latter asked him.

« Yasuo, what the fuck is that ? » Not always that his brother swore, he was always polite but when that happened, it was a sign the situation was critical.

It didn’t soothe Yasuo’s fears, on the opposite. He kept his back turned to the latter while he took care of the petals, hiding it like always in a tissue to be thrown out. What a shame, he had been so careful and now it was ruined.

« Yasuo. » A reminder, since there was no answer yet. It was clear Yone wouldn’t let him go that easily.

« Not obvious enough ? I’m sick. » With that he sat in bed, back to the wall and he held his pillow as to help in this shitshow that was his life for more than a month.

« I see that. How long ? …why didn’t you tell us ? » At first Yone seemed to stay rather serious but in the end he couldn’t help that deep worry.

« Don’t know exactly, I think it’s been one month and half. » So tempted to just burry his face in the pillow and pretend it was a nightmare. Sadly it wouldn’t work this way, he had to yet to fully reply : « …it’s not your business. »

Obviously Yone didn’t take that well, a bit pacing in the room while keeping an eye on Yasuo : « That’s stupid and you know it. You must tell us, it’s serious. Who else knows ? »

« No one. »

Was he shaking ? Maybe, just a little. It wasn’t fun to be lectured, even by his brother. Because he would worry and then he would have Yasuo to see a doctor and then everything would go down from there. No good outcome.

His answer met silence, until Yone asked more : « Not even a doctor ? »

« No. » Talking was painful, he didn’t like that at all so he kept it short.

« You’ll have to. » Steps coming closer until Yone sat down on the floor near the bed, looking at him : « Please, it’s important. You can’t just deal with this alone. »

« I do. Watch me. » No way even to meet his gaze, it was hard enough to recognize he needed help right now.

A sigh came out, typical of every occasion he gave Yone a hard time. He was far from helping and he knew it.

« Yasuo, you know it won’t end well if you keep this on. At least let me help you. »

« No… » Why didn’t he leave him alone ? Yasuo wished this hell to be a dream, to forget everything.

Yone stood and this time sat down on his mattress, still keeping some distance.

« I won’t tell Yi. It’s about him, isn’t it ? »

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also yeah, i'll be playing with POV to get this moving and squeeze more feels!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey!  
> another update, we getting closer!!
> 
> thanks for reading <3

~Yi~

_Still not over._

More time had gone and Yi still heard their roommate cough from time to time. He even swore it got a bit more frequent, to his great worry. Really, this situation wasn’t fun. Yasuo didn’t give any proper answer when he asked, because Yi did ask a few more times when he caught him on the instant.

Could he be blamed for worrying ? Not really. Yet it seemed obviously the latter was growing annoyed or a little cranky each time he was asked about that. Understandable, it mustn’t have been fun to be reminded of this particular. But if the intention was good, was he in the wrong ? Yi wasn’t sure and nothing changed, more than worried.

So to say it wasn’t really relaxing to hear his dear friend cough – sometimes it a rather concerning way – then deny any risk or illness. Alright, maybe Yi had the reflex to look after his close ones, to be sure they were healthy, and that could be a little bothering for them but he meant well.

Unable to do more, he resolved himself to just stay back and keep a worried eye after Yasuo. They were all adults but that didn’t stop him from ensuring everyone was healthy here. Roommates, after all, but nothing more. No way for Yi to pretend being controlling for the sake of Yasuo’s health. It would just make it worse.

Later there was still one good news. After his silent worrying, he got the occasion to talk with Yone about it. This wasn’t so easy to do, Yi prefered not to have Yasuo nearby to listen since he thought he wouldn’t take this well. Maybe he was overthinking and another opinion on the topic would help.

One evening he managed to talk while Yasuo was gone out. Just him and Yone, a good occasion to safely ask if he knew about his brother’s issues.

It was interesting, really. From what Yone said, he had indeed noticed the same thing that Yi, which was a rather persistent coughing and topic shut down each time he tried to bring it up. So first good news, it meant Yi was imagining this and there was indeed something worth mentionning. Then Yone explained that once he still got his brother to face his problems and agree to see a doctor. Difficult, from what he told but necessary given Yasuo’s condition. And so he had seen a doctor. Still, Yone didn’t know what the issue was since it was between Yasuo and his doctor but it was a first step.

Now Yi could relax, just a little. At least Yasuo had seen a doctor for whatever he got. On the other hand, this wasn’t so calming. Neither him or Yone knew what the latter had caught and keeping that under silence only made him worry again. It couldn’t be good. Why hide a medical condition when it was harmless ? All this meant it was serious and Yasuo couldn’t tell them, be it by shame or fear. In all honesty Yi wouldn’t judge at all, there was no reason to be scared but he still understood he couldn’t force someone – even less a friend and roommate – to disclose that kind of personal information.

A loop of worry and peace. Definitely he was thinking too far with all this, surely he should focus on something more sueful. And Yet Yi couldn’t, keeping a concerned gaze over his friend when he thought he wasn’t looking.

~Yasuo~

Life sucked, especially his, right now. But hey, it wasn’t new. So far he thought he was doing rather well until he got the first signs of a deadly disease. At least he wasn’t doomed to a sad death because his feelings weren’t requited. Oh wait, it was the case.

Almost two months had gone since Yasuo had coughed his first petals, soft white that now filled him with terrible melancholia and low bitterness. It wasn’t fair and yet it happened, barely sparing a gaze to these torn flowers before he threw it away. Something so small and yet soon enough it would ruin his life. It already started, Yone had found out about the disease because of these damned flowers.

A first fuck up. Well at least it wasn’t Yi. But it still made him really angry to have failed to keep this down. Now Yone knew and knowledge was dangerous. He had sworn not to tell Yi because, for whatever fucking reasons, he had already guessed Yi was the target of these useless feelings. This was already quite a hard blow to take, because so far Yasuo thought he was quiet enough about his ‘crush’. Obviously not because his brother wasn’t surprised. This was the first difficult point.

The second difficult point was the appointment with a doctor. Yone convinced him to go, at least for him, if not for his own damn health. More than reluctant Yasuo had taken an appointment and gone, done and dealt with. However it didn’t end there. He had learned a few things but he did already know the most important, which were the risk as time went and the best solution. Being nice while battling hanahaki wasn’t easy but Yasuo still made an effort, people didn’t deserve to be treated like shit just because he felt like one.

The doctor was quite understanding and even though Yasuo could turn sour in no time, she didn’t seem fazed by that, surely she got more than her deal of patients being difficult because of their health. So far there was no real help to give except if he wished to take the surgery. Yasuo refused, for the same reasons than before. No other solution so he had to deal with that on his own. For real, there was no medication, maybe take something to ease the coughing but it would still happen no matter what.

For now he had a new appointment and nothing to look forward to. This would be merely to see how the disease went but he wasn’t in the mood to learn how bad it was. A bit depressing indeed. Everyday he saw Yi and a few times he asked him what was going on, if he had seen a doctor about it. Such light worry was sweet but Yasuo felt stupid for even hoping. Of course his friend would worry, it was normal. Part of his mind would jump on the conclusion that he cared but sadly Yi would never care for him the way he needed it.

Days would go on, only the number of flowers and petals as mark. Little by little it got worse, Yasuo could just feel it even if he was still rather healthy. Fear was still present but it made him a little numb, looking at these signs of potential death as if it was nothing. Of course he didn’t want to die, especially not for that but he counted the flowers and his mind was empty of thoughts.

All that mattered was to carry on, hide the flowers and seem casual. Then maybe Yi would stop worrying. This was all Yasuo hoped, at least to save him the trouble. Wait and maybe he could hope to forget this ticking bomb at the back of his mind.

Really, it would be hell if Yi found out. And yet it happened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heheheheh soon


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!  
> here is next update! more angst :3
> 
> thanks for reading!!

~Yi~

_Hanahaki…_

It was far worse than Yi thought. Yasuo was sick and it was a case of hanahaki.

In bed as he tried to fall asleep for next day, he thought again and again about what he learned a few hours ago. At last he had learned what his dear friend suffered from but at what cost ? There wasn’t even relief to know the name of the disease, it was dampened by the damned deadliness expected. Among all the illnesses possible, it was that. Yi had to admit it crushed him more than he thought, fear plaguing his thoughts along confusion. What he learned that evening implied too many things.

First, he really hadn’t been prepared to see Yasuo have another coughing fit while he was washing the dishes, only to find a few petals. In itself Yi wouldn’t have really paid attention to this detail, more focused on the latter’s health but something was so wrong in the silence that followed, in Yasuo’s expression. Even Yone had kept his silence. So it hit home and everything made sense.

At the beginning, a bit disbelieving Yi asked about it but soon enough Yasuo denied everything and got extremely defensive, as if scared. It was quite heartbreaking to see him react like this and it made everything more true.

The conversation that followed wasn’t pleasant, to say the least. Not exactly yelling but things were said harshly, with a lot of obvious pain. This was what struck Yi, the latter’s deep pain. After denying for some time, Yasuo broke and let admitted being sick, knowing very well that he could die and that it was none of their business. After that and before Yi could try to soothe or calm him, Yasuo had left in a hurry and slammed the door of his bedroom shut.

That wasn’t all for the evening.

Beyond the shock of such a news and the immediate worry, there was also the talk with Yone. Neither tried to bother Yasuo in his own room, it didn’t seem fair or even good to do so. So Yi and Yone stayed in the kitchen in deafening silence. Not a move, until the latter spoke. Here came the second hurtful news of the day. Yone explained that he already knew about Yasuo’s disease, for about a month. And it hurt more than everything because obviously they kept Yi out of this. Of course, it was understandable not to want to talk about that with anyone but a doctor, plus Yone was his older brother so it was normal. Yi tried to put that aside, it wasn’t helping in the moment but he did feel a bit betrayed, when he shouldn’t. This wasn’t about him, it was about Yasuo’s health that could decline little by little as time went.

So Yone knew and kept it for himself, at his brother’s request. He was aware that it couldn’t have stayed hidden for so long, at some point there would be a bit of drama after the disease really took over. To his credit, he did look very sorry for not telling Yi but again, this wasn’t about them but about Yasuo. Now everyone knew under this roof, one less secret. _Don’t think about that._ Yi refused to surrend to bitterness, just because he wasn’t told. This was unfair to Yasuo.

On the other hand, it kept him distracted from the real issue. His dear friend was sick and it could end pretty badly. Understandable that Yone didn’t want to share that piece of information, it wasn’t his right. He still explained that indeed Yasuo was sickly in love, obviously. That he was convinced it wouldn’t be requited. This made Yi so mad and sad and yet he suprpessed it as quick, even as it overwhelmed him right now. His dear friend was so in love with a nameless person that he risked to die. Life was unfair sometimes. Yone wasn’t the pessimistic kind but when he talked, it was clear his brother had confided in him and had no hopes. He had given up. The outburst earlier was due to this, without a doubt. For all this time they had asked what was wrong and surely Yasuo knew he was slowly dying for someone that didn’t return it.

Speaking of, Yi wondered about this person. Without a doubt it was someone he never met. Yasuo still had a circle of friends but they were mostly from his university and so Yi never had the occasion to meet any of them since he wasn’t really one to go out. Yone did know some of them, so Yi asked him about it. No idea. It seemed that Yasuo had chosen to keep that name to his grave. As his brother said in defeat, there were probably no chance to convince him to confess. He simply wouldn’t do it. Aside, it still made sense or there wouldn’t be a case of hanahaki. It made Yi more sad to realize that there was no good solution.

Frustrated with himself and that terrible worry, he tried to find sleep. This day definitely wasn’t good. Quietly he wondered if it was a good idea to have Yasuo to sit down for a talk. However he still remembered quite well the outburst when confronted so Yi wasn’t so sure.

_Maybe_. All he wanted was to help.

~Yasuo~

_Fuck, he knows…_

After Yone, now Yi knew too about his disease. Really Yasuo felt like shit about this, not only he was sick but now his roomates knew about it. This was probably meant to happen but all the same, he didn’t handle it well.

At the same time, it was about him only. He had no need to tell anyone about his, except the doctor he was seeing about it. No one else. First telling Yone wasn’t planned and now Yi knew too in a similarly crappy incident. Yasuo was done.

There was still one good thing in this word : Yi didn’t know everything. Really, this would have been the last straw if he came to realize that Yasuo was literally dying for him. Well, this sounded crazy now. Yasuo hated that, the risk of guilting the latter because he put himself in this mess. He didn’t need pity. This was still one thing to cling to, Yi knew he had hanahaki but not that he was the target of it. From there he could just hope not once it would be known. No need to worry Yi further, especially because Yasuo imagined he would feel incredibly bad for not returning it.

Oh all this was unfair but he had no choice. The flowers never left, just like these feelings that blossomed each time he saw Yi. Even now. It was painful but he couldn’t help it. Not his fault, not Yi’s fault.

All he had to do was wait, yearn for something impossible and hope not to choke in the middle of the night. Already he started to feel worse, the beginning of the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright, i think we good next chapter xD  
> sorry, it's a bit of a speedrun but i'm hyped for the fluff!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELL YEAH, LET'S GO!
> 
> thanks for reading!!

_Stop this._

It didn’t help, far from it. Yet not once Yi could truly escape these thoughts. Quite horrible, never letting him at peace. The disease had brought such a weigh on the mood in this cozy flat. Time went day by day without any chance to stop it and it made him so scare.

For now Yasuo still looked a bit healthy. Everything held in the ‘a bit’ because in fact it was obvious he wasn’t doing as good as before, when he wasn’t sick. Hanahaki was quite difficult to detect in itself, it simply looked like he hadn’t slept for a long time, coupled with flu symptoms. Probably he couldn’t sleep as well as before. The worst was the coughing, it never really gave a break. Now that everyone knew under this roof, it would be understandable that Yasuo didn’t hide the flowers anymore and yet he still did it, even though he didn’t look panicked when it happened in the others’ presence.

_It won’t get better…_

Yi had no idea what to do. He did his best in making the latter’s life easier, small attentions sometimes. However more and more this would be met by reluctance and almost annoyance. Yasuo took it as pity for his condition, as one would treat a dying man – technically he could be – and it pissed him off. So Yi didn’t try further, a bit wounded but again, he wasn’t the ill one, he couldn’t truly understand. And it hurt, again and again. A bit later Yasuo would apologize but between this and his exhaustion, it didn’t seem to help his mood. To get a smile was already such a victory.

Then he resolved himself to stay back and follow routine, as if everything was fine in the best of worlds. Innerly, his heart was bleeding. To carry on was difficult but at least keeping façade was the the easiest thing for him. Put on a brave smile then maybe it would help the other two. He didn’t try to get out of his way to help Yasuo but still made a few things that were meant to stay unnoticed, like keeping some of his favorite foods.

That was all. He was so close to just ask Yasuo to sit for a talk, to convince him not to give up. To confess. Who knew ? Maybe he was wrong and that person loved him back. But from all he had seen already and the latter’s desastrous mood inflicted to both him and Yone, it seemed better not to try. It would be like riping a bandaid off a wound still healing. Useless, only able to hurt.

Yone didn’t seem to do better than Yi. Sometimes they happened to talk when Yasuo was out at night and then when he was in his bedroom after it became clear he couldn’t handle to go out. Whispers about their worries and possible tactics to help, even in background. It was so heartbreaking to see Yone like this, because his little bro was sick and probably going to die. He told the information he got about Yasuo’s appointments. That part still hurt Yi, even so slightly, the last one to know about everything happening. Hadn’t Yasuo failed his façade, he potentially wouldn’t have known in time.

This was his worst enemy, bitterness. It wasn’t so present at first but it only got stronger as time went and Yasuo’s condition worsened. Yi failed to know where it came from and yet it became too powerful. No matter the topic discussed with Yone – since strangely his conversations with Yasuo had diminished – it would happen, a constant sting and bitter taste about what was to come. Identifying it was difficult, Yi first thought it was simply about losing his dear friend.

It took a whole new turn when he realized it was directed to that nameless person responsible despite themselves for this tragedy. Yi hated that, to dislike someone just because of this, something that couldn’t be blamed on anyone. The source of the issue was feelings, impossible to chose and control. And sometimes he thought about this stranger that stole his friend’s heart, causing a rare disease and how it made himr esent someone he had never met.

Disgraceful, to almost hate someone that probably didn’t even know about hanahaki. No one deserved that. And yet Yi became bitter about it, without any reasons at first. He had questioned it over time, to fall that low it must have been serious or crazy. Maybe a normal reaction for certainly losing a dear one by advance. It sounded hollow. So many nights and days in classes thinking about this, wondering why hate someone like that. Irrational.

_I hate this_.

It didn’t make a lot of sense, it wasn’t helping and most of all Yi felt bad for this. Emotions too strong to be repressed and yet illogical. _Why them ?_ At that point, this question was useless. Yet it wouldn’t change so many things had Yasuo fallen for somebody else. _Oh_.

Here came the answer, all by itself. _No… ?_ Why such worry ? Why such attention to someone that he didn’t even know ? Only for one reason. Now it became clear. Jealousy. What he had struggled to identify. Yi stared at the wall, in the darkness of his room. _It’s that… ?_

Piercing pain, throbbing. It started to make sense, all of it, at least to explain hiw own reaction. _I… ?_ It hurt. Maybe Yi was wrong to think like this but it seemed it was too far from friendship. He couldn’t have reacted this way if he really considered Yasuo a friend. It hurt even more, digging through flesh. Everything reconsidered under this new angle. Was it true ? Feelings ? Worry could be given no matter how close but this right now didn’t feel like it.

_Stop stop stop. Think_.

If the world was different, if things had gone differently, would he mind giving it a try ? _Do I…love him ?_ To simply formulate this in his mind was too much. Because it didn’t feel different from all the years he had known Yasuo. it was still the same thing, same happiness to see him, same concern after him. Was he wrong from the beginning ? Did it change at some point ? Yi couldn’t know anymore, it hurt when he realized he would even like to be that close.

This was the origin of all this bitterness, it would seem. To see someone he potentially loved slowly dying for someone that didn’t care. No matter their reasons.

_I love him… ?_ It didn’t sound wrong. On the opposite.

For a very long time, Yi cried. All this was too much at once, plus Yasuo’s declining health. A lot going on that could explain such reaction. And now he cried a little, overwhelmed by this epiphany. Because it was certainly cruel to realize feelings when it was too late. Would it have ever worked ? It didn’t matter, Yasuo was in love with someone else, he couldn’t ever hope.

Heavy tears of frustration poured for this newly realized love, already crushed.

~

Daily life took another turn from there. A little bittersweet, so to say. Yi felt a lot more calm about what he had realized but pain remained, tearing his heart apart so slowly. From now he saw Yasuo everyday, even as the latter didn’t try to stay long in presence of his roommates. It was still a blessing since it gave Yi a small time to see how he was doing, his health from a glance. Of course it didn’t tell much, for more he would have to ask and Yasuo never was much a talker about it since the truth exploded. Always quite tired, it was a bit scary without context and worse knowing what was going on.

The real blow was to register how right he was about his feelings. This wasn’t friendship. Aware of what he discovered about himself, Yi could just realize the light pull toward his dear friend, the urge to be there for him. It hurt. He was indeed in love and he smiled when he saw Yasuo, no matter how painful it was. He couldn’t let this be known. Hopefully he was quite good at hiding a few things, at keeping for himself what wasn’t useful to know for the others. These feelings were part of it. No need to bother Yasuo with something like this.

Silence became unbearable though. Days went and it was clear Yasuo suffered each time he coughed, even as he made an obvious effort at minimizing. It hurt Yi as much to see that – probably less because he couldn’t know how it was for him – to see him endure when himself couldn’t help. Otherwise Yasuo seemed like in half denial, doing as if there was nothing life-threatening in this home. As if he wasn’t dying. Maybe it was a way to cope, no way to know. Yi and Yone both kept themselves from bringing the topic up, it wouldn’t help.

At some point he would break, no doubt.

~

It was getting worse indeed. Earlier in that Thursday evening, Yasuo had such a violent fit of coughing, plus the need to throw up, he couldn’t even stay up too late. A shame, his usual healthy self wouldn’t have thought going to bed at 9 like a kid. This wasn’t even Yi or Yone’s decision, he chose that himself after the mess, obviously sick.

_This is a bad day_.

These happened sometimes but remained rare, even though he deeply knew with time it would only increase. Nothing could stop the disease unless the surgery or a miraculous confession. There, perfect thing to think about, now Yi was back on his low bitterness.

None of it was fun, he would gladly trade this reaction with anyone. It wasn’t helpful and he disliked the bad person it made him. _Not their fault._ They couldn’t have caused this even on purpose, feelings just happened. He knew that too well.

A sigh escaped him.

« What’s wrong ? » Obviously Yone noticed and asked, looking up from his laptop.

They were both on the couch at the moment, enjoying their time before bed. They wouldn’t go as early as Yasuo but still, there were classes next morning, not to forget.

Yi didn’t know what to say. This was a bit personal but at the same time they were all in this together. Yone had always listened to both their issues when there were a few. Even when right now Yi was still lightly wounded for being left out of the issue at first. _Get over it._

After a pause, he still felt Yone’s gaze on him so he answered : « It’s…not easy to explain. » From the start he spoke quite low, just enough to be heard by the latter. No need to be heard by Yasuo.

Speaking of, their roommate probably couldn’t hear from his bedroom. Just it was in this setting that they sometimes discussed what they thought about the disease without bothering Yasuo.

No doubt Yone understood from the tone that it was important or personal, as he whispered too : « Tell me anyway. »

Was it a good idea ? Yi didn’t know. If he explained, he would have to literally admit to Yone that he had feelings for his little brother, at the worst timing ever. Especially because Yasuo obviously already loved someone else. Was it smart to say ? _Ah…_ Another sigh.

_Alright, let’s do this._ At least he trusted Yone enough for this, it wouldn’t be told unless he allowed him to. Anyway, would it truly change anything ? These feelings didn’t matter.

Yi put his laptop aside to really face the latter. Even doing that was difficult, he didn’t know how stupid this was. « …I don’t really know how to explain it. I guess I’m not really accepting what’s going to happen. About… » Small gesture toward Yasuo’s bedroom. Really, the fact that he couldn’t voice it fully showed he wasn’t doing fine.

At least it set the tone of the topic. Yone looked serious, nodding : « Same. It’s…sickening. I don’t try to think much about it. » Such sadness in his voice.

Already Yi berated himself for bringing this up, it just made the latter sad. _Damnit_.

« Sorry. » He really was.

« Not your fault, don’t worry. »

Deep breath taken, maybe talking would help : « It’s just…I hate it. I don’t want to lose him, he’s too precious to me. To us. Sometimes I come to think it’s horribly unfair…if only I was the one he loved. » Confessing that was so painful, he couldn’t stand Yone’s gaze as soon as he said this.

It was so dumb to react like this. Maybe telling his feelings was quite inapropriate in their situation. But could he be blamed for this ? It was just too heavy to bear.

« Wait, what do you mean ? » The tone was unexpected, not exactly sad anymore.

At first he struggled a little not to stutter or anything. Yi still made an effort to look at him in the eye again, even as it became too hard to do.

« I love him. Sorry. » Why apologize ? This was a pure reflex, by protection. He never meant to fall and yet he did.

What Yi didn’t really plan was the sudden move, registered only once Yone got to him, frantic grasp on his shoulders. _What ??_

« Oh my god, for real ?? » Eye contact, never letting go. So much anticipation for an answer that seemed important. The tone was too loud for their usual conversations.

_Ahh… ?_ A bit panicked by all this, Yi just nodded : « Yes… » It was too much at once, no idea why it made Yone react like this.

« Holy fuck, I can’t believe ! » Not a second lost, now Yone hugged him tightly. « Thank you ! »

_Did I say it wrong_ _… ?_ This was surreal and Yi didn’t understand the smallest bit. Yone seemed overjoyed, he even swore.

« Yone ?? »

« Go tell him ! » Definitely too loud.

« No, I can’t… » Between panick and things not making sense, there was still this awful fear of causing any harm.

« He loves you too, idiot ! Damnit, go tell him ! The sooner, the better. »

Words were heard, registered then made sense.

_Me ?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry, this will be for next chapter~ (i swear, i'm a bit dying to write this ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey!  
> first, i'm sorry, i thought it would be shorter but inspiration struck xD  
> second, ENJOY
> 
> thanks for reading!

Words rang in Yi’s mind, repeated over and over again as to make sure he would never forget. Did he really hear that right ? Disbelief was the first reaction, along shock. It was too much, after such bitterness against someone and the potential loss of his dear friend. And now this.

_He loves me too… ?_

Horrible, incredible. Both happened at the same time in his mind and yet he couldn’t bring himself to say anything, staring in shock at Yone, pretending he wasn’t trembling from the drop of tension.

« Me ? But I thought he… » No way to finish that, it cut his heart too deep. His voice reflected the emotions bubbling up at the surface yet not ready for anything.

« It’s you ! Damnit Yi, come ! Right now ! »

Surely this wasn’t fast enough for Yone and indeed the situation seemed quite urgent if everything was true. Without waiting further, he nearly jumped from the couch and pulled Yi to come with him. All this with a strange mix of relief and worry, that made it impossible to ignore. Spurred into the action, Yi just followed by reflex while his thoughts raced to a critical point. It couldn’t be happening right now. _It’s true ?_

Next thing he registered was being literally shoved in Yasuo’s room, with the stupid reflex to stand there trying to piece everything together from the last minute. Then he realized where he was – barely a few seconds after being led here – as Yone closed the door behind him. _Whaaaaat ?_ Too much, his brain couldn’t register everything. At the same time the older brother shouted from behind the door and a more quiet noise caught Yi’s attention, in the bedroom. Of course, this would wake Yasuo, at least if he was asleep.

« Talk to him now ! Sort this out ! »

« What the fuck ? Yi ? »

Both happened nearly at the same time and that was enough to make panick hit. _Ahhhh_. Reality was quick to hit him, now too aware of where he was and more importantly with who. Yi looked at the latter, which wasn’t difficult because the room was dim except for Yasuo’s phone that he must have been using till the commotion. And now he stared at Yi with a lot of surprise and agonizing emotion that could be interpreted different ways. _No…._ Either he was scared or he was too shocked in his annoyance to say anything yet.

Everything came back as quick and it overwhelmed Yi as soon as he saw the friend he loved too much. Bitterness, jealousy, fear, worry. The first spark of hope was half smothered by now, it scared him too much to check and ask. What if it was wrong ? Yone seemed convinced of the opposite but at the same time, they hadn’t talked about it deeply.

Frozen there, unable to decide what to do, Yi panicked innerly. He wasn’t ready to confess, especially not when it was so uncertain. And Yasuo stared at him, recovering a little but still quite confused about the whole thing. Indeed, he must have just heard his roommates running into his bedroom, only for one to be trapped inside with him, along some shouting.

« Ah… » This was a total mess and now came up the urge to just back off and go to bed in shame. Still looking at Yasuo, he stepped back at the door and trying to open it but obviously Yone was making sure he wouldn’t escape.

« No ! I won’t move. » Clear from the other side.

Probably Yi would have managed a way out but he didn’t want to attract to much attention to this and paying a new door would be stupid.

So there was no other solution. Maybe this was the right thing to do, if Yone was right. Yi did want it to be true, his heart yearned for this faint hope. A miracle. And yet nothing was sure and right then he had to confess to that same dear friend that saw them barge in his room for no reason.

None had move since. Just at some point Yasuo coughed, breaking silence before he asked again : « What the fuck is going on ? »

Between the coughing and the question, Yi was a bit freaking out innerly, though managing not to show much. Anyway, the latter couldn’t see so well with the lack of light, no way to read expressions.

« Yasuo, can I switch on the light please ? I…I have to tell you something. » Oh sometimes he was glad to control enough his voice when it was too much. At least for now it didn’t betray anything, though it might later after revealing all that he was.

Silence answered him at first, although he could still see perfectly Yasuo’s expression thanks to the light from his screen. It didn’t seem good. Exactly the same face he made when it was a bad day and he couldn’t stand to stay with them for too long. A sort of reluctance but far too emotional to be a lack of fucks to give. It was pain. Another thing that might bear another meaning if indeed Yone was correct. _Please…_

There was a move, as Yasuo finally broke eye contact and instead took his attention on the small task of putting away the few flowers from the last fit of coughing. Yi noticed the small place on what served as bedside table where indeed flowers were kept. From the quantity it couldn’t have been for too long, maybe the latest hours. It still hurt a lot to see.

« Go on. »

Fast, low enough that he could have missed it. But it was good, Yasuo was letting him. A chance.

Without waiting Yi came closer to the latter’s bed, where he was now sitting up, leaning against the wall while keeping his blanket. _Cold ?_ He didn’t know what hanahaki caused but as time went, symptoms could only get worse. To be fair Yasuo looked bad, either really tired or really impacted by the disease, probably both.

Not thinking much, he sat on the floor next to the bed. Now with the light both could see each other well, no way for him to hide. Yi knew this was going to be risky and painful. He had to or Yone wouldn’t let him go, convinced as he was of the requited feelings. _I don’t know. If only_.

Such a strange moment to be in. Between anxiety and deep worry for Yasuo’s health, he didn’t know what to say. _Confess_. Easier to say than to do. Not once Yi would have thought about telling his most secret feelings to Yasuo. Keeping eye contact was difficult, at some point he would have to break it.

« So ? » Obviously a little impatient or anxious. Indeed he had someone in his room that usually never went there.

_Now_.

Deep breath. Exhale.

« I-I love you. » There, wasn’t it the most simple thing to say ? Meanwhile it squeezed Yi’s heart just to gather the courage and say it, not once looking away.

As if it wasn’t enough, it forced him to register Yasuo’s reaction, from surprise to equal disbelief. Almost shock. Yi wanted to avert his gaze, without a doubt he was blushing dark without a possibility to hide it. Left there to be seen, open and vulnerable.

_Too much…_

A whisper came, just as Yasuo’s expression betrayed a lot of pain : « Get out. »

This was how hearts were broken.

Yi couldn’t deny how awful it felt in that instant, to see his one love blurting this order while looking so hurt. Probably it affected them both. As soon he hated himself for even thinking it was possible. _No…_

Before he could even say something out of the cheer pain he experienced, Yasuo spoke again and it cut still as deep : « Yone told you ? That’s it ?? That’s the reason for all this ?? He asked you to say that ?? » So much pain in his tone and his expression, not even trying to keep it low.

_What ?_

Why ? Yi didn’t understand at first, already feeling rejected plus now Yasuo was nearly lashing out at him. Never he meant to inflict that.

« No, he didn’t… Why ? » So lost. This was why he was unsure about the whole thing and now it seemed to be right.

« I don’t care ! He shouldn’t have told you ! I don’t want your pity ! » It grew angry, although this sounded more like the kind of anger made to protect when pain was too much.

Words taken. _Pity ?_ It started to make sense. _He thinks Yone did this ?_ Was Yasuo so convinced of the unrequited aspect ? Little by little it became clear that Yone had told the truth, all this time he was sickly in love with Yi. So now he was convinced his brother revealed it in a desperate attempt to save him. That there weren’t real feelings. To realize such a thing was horrible and Yi suffered for the latter, if it was correct indeed.

« No, please, Yasuo… » As reflex he came even closer, still sitting on the floor, and he held Yasuo’s hand in this wreck of emotions. « It’s not pity, I do love you. Too much for a friend… »

At that moment he feared he might cry. Not the best reaction but right now he was too close to actually lose his only chance for happiness with Yasuo.

« No…You can’t… » There, anger was already fading away to be replaced by vulnerability. If that wasn’t telling of Yasuo’s feelings. Just before he had to cough again, taking his hand away from Yi in that reflex.

_Ah…_ Dumb to feel sad simply for a gesture but instead, Yi stood and sat down at the edge of the latter’s bed, seeking the faintest contact possible. He couldn’t bear to see Yasuo suffer from the disease and it made him more helpless to see such attempt at pushing his feelings away.

« Yasuo, tell me…Do you love me… ? » All that mattered. Depending on that answer, everything would change.

The shy attempt at going away from Yi broke his heart further. Everything made him reconsider the purpose of all this.

No answer. Yasuo averted his gaze as a few tears fell.

« A-Alright, I won’t force you. Just know that I’m serious, I wouldn’t lie to you… » Decision taken, despite the slow pain of not hearing any confirmation.

Yi stood and as quick the latter surged to stop him, holding him back by his wrist.

« No ! Please…I-I…I love you too… » So scared, as if it was his fault and he just committed a crime.

That was it. All they needed. _It’s true_. Joy blossomed as soon as Yi registered these shaky words. Without thinking he sat back on the mattress, coming closer to the latter. Yasuo looked so much in pain, not just the disease. Was it so hopeless ? Did he believe from the start that it had no chance ? Obviously yes or he wouldn’t be sick and now trying to hide his face as tears went.

It did make Yi cry in return, shared tears of relief and pain for the whole process. When he could he opened his arms to the latter and after a first second of hesitation, Yasuo hugged him with strenght. _Oh…_ A few sobs came in this tight embrace, both trying to give and take as much as possible.

_It’s real, he loves me too…_ Relief washed over him, holding Yasuo as close as possible.

« It’s alright…Thank you, Yasuo. » Whispered close. « I love you so much. » It felt like he would never say it enough.

This was when he felt it, lips against his cheek. Then love could start to blossom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hopefully next update will have Yasuo's POV, poor boy must be dying inside for feeling that much  
> AND NOW FLUFF MAY START


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!!  
> oh boy, this isn't close to end yet xD
> 
> thanks for reading <3

Yasuo still heard it, again and again. What he thought he would never get to hear in his life. _He loves me too…_ The most wonderful words in the world and it came from Yi.

So indeed it was more than normal for him to cry right now, in that emotional rollercoaster. It was over, his one true love was requited. It would heal him without a doubt and even that, it wasn’t his main focus. No, what he was truly grateful for were these feelings given to him. Yi’s love, under the shape of a desperate confession on the floor by his bed. Not once Yasuo would have imagined being loved the same way and even less witnessing such a confession.

It had been difficult, between his first confusion to see Yone and Yi making a lot of noise in the flat then literally barging into his room. It didn’t make sense without context and even now he couldn’t exactly piece everything together. All that he knew was that Yi was here and asked to talk, just to reveal his feelings.

To be honest, Yasuo still felt quite bad for how he had reacted but at the same time, he was completely convinced that he wouldn’t get so much. Hanahaki never appeared without reasons, it had to be a serious case. So yes, he had denied these feelings at first. Now he regretted it so much, Yi’s pain was so obvious as soon as he order him out. _I’m sorry…_ Maybe a need to protect himself. It seemed that Yone was involved and out of nowhere Yi confessed, of course he would think it was a terrible attempt at keeping him alive. Lies couldn’t and that was the worst part, faked feelins wouldn’t help.

Now they both knew and it was too much for Yasuo. It still hurt deep in his chest, the disease heavy on his body despite the new relief of being accepted. Hopefully it would disappear little by little, if everything was true. _It is. It’s real…_ Part of him wasn’t ready to believe but he had the proof in his arms, Yi crying with him for this wreck of emotions. Surely this was normal too, himself had no idea the latter loved him and potentially it had hurt him. Deathly sick, after all.

The only thing Yasuo could give at the moment besides a few weak sobs was a peck to Yi’s cheek. His gratitude. Yi had proven him wrong, he wasn’t doomed to cut these feelings out or die. And before anything else, he was loved.

_Thank you…_

Again and again on repeat in his mind, the same confession and sweet words. Yasuo would cherish it forever. The peck last forever, the time to convey how thankful he was. It hurt but it was decreasing slowly. Like breathing again.

A little or maybe an eternity later, Yi took so shy distance while keeping his hands on him. No matter what, Yasuo tensed on reflex, clinging to him with the small strenght he had left. _No…_ Yet nothing bad happened, the latter simply craddled his face with infinite gentleness, smiling so fondly. The tears probably had stopped and their streaks were still visible down his cheeks. Glad. So close and dear, Yasuo found him so beautiful despite the many marks of previous sadness and worry.

Before he could take as many details in his mind, a short gesture caught his attention and breath at the same time. Thumb brushing away his tears, Yi closed distance again as he maintained eye contact until the very last moment. Right there he stopped, the shortest distance before he would have claimed Yasuo’s lips. Always that kind gaze.

Not a single move. A pause went, like a silent question. Yasuo could feel his warm presence, breath, everything. _Ahhhh…_ It really was something else to be close to kiss and yet not really. Obviously Yi prefered to give him the choice, unvoiced.

Shaking, Yasuo had lost any semblance of control a long time ago. They were at the brink of kissing, something he had thought about a few times like some highly impossible fantasy. Unable to take more, he broke and begged.

« Please… »

Oh what a dear look, Yi seemed so innocently surprise to hear that. It still worked. Without waiting anymore he closed distance and kissed Yasuo slowly. The tenderness couldn’t be made up, not once he would have imagined this. The kiss was so gentle, very chaste as if scared to take too much at once. It would be a lie to say it didn’t touch him, in the opposite. Yasuo longed for more, pushing a little into contact. _Mmmmh…_ It was too good, not enough and everything he wanted right now. On reflex he held Yi closer, urging him almost on his lap which he did gladly. Hands grabbed and hands trembled, settling at the back of the latter’s head.

Soon the kiss had to stop, barely the time to recover and realize. Then it went on again, angle changing to make it deeper. Yasuo asked as much as he could, as if it was a dream and he had to take most of it before the end. Hopefully Yi was ready to oblige and give even more.

No more tears, only soft relief. All that they needed after such rough time.

All this went well until there was a knock at the door, immediately followed by Yone’s voice as he opened the door : « Hey, everything is fine ? I didn’t hear y—woah, okay ! I’m out ! Have fun ! » Then the door slammed shut, to end beautifully on that interruption.

_WHAT ?_

Not difficult to understand from the noise. His brother just tried to see what was happening and obviously he found them like this.

On reflex, both him and Yi stopped and looked at the now closed door in similar shock. It didn’t take long for them to be mortified, at least Yasuo was sure he was blushing and the latter was too. Frozen on the spot, in bed, even if the position was far from incorrect it was still quite affectionate. And Yone had walked on them. _Damnit_. First the troubles, then the confession and tears, now that ? Yasuo was done, it was too much in barely less than fifteen minutes.

Staring at each other, none seemed to know what to do. At the same time, it wasn’t like every day. A lot had been going on and finally found a solution. Yasuo knew he shouldn’t react like a kid but right now he felt like it, too tired and overwhelmed by the latest events. So he gave up and returned to hug Yi tightly, nuzzling his neck to hide.

« Fuck…. »

« Indeed, I forgot about him. Sorry… » From the tone, Yi wasn’t doing better, a little flustered.

« Not you fault, not your fault…By the way, what happened ? Why is he like this ? » Yasuo was more than curious about it because clearly the confession didn’t come from nowhere and given his brother’s actions, there must have been something.

Now that the initial shock was gone, it seemed to go better. Yi relaxed a little and welcomed him properly in the embrace, a hand through his hair to soothe. A sigh went and it made Yasuo a lot more curious despite his exhaustion.

« It’s a bit long, maybe I should tell you tomorrow. You need to rest. » So sweet concern.

« Mmmh I still want to know… »

Easy to be a little childish, it distracted him from the cheer thrill of having Yi so close and loving. The news still had to sink in.

« Alright, I will tell you. A bit earlier I’ve been talking with Yone, since he asked. I must be honest, I was rather…sad about you and the disease so I guess he noticed and I vented. »

A small pause went while it should probably not. Yasuo parted to gaze at him, a little confused. _He was sad ?_ Of course, since there were feelings. But it hurt all the same to know Yi was impacted too. Right now he accepted to meet his gaze and it was clear he wasn’t so fine, maybe sad again.

« And then ? »

« I’m not really proud of that, I’v left my emotions take control. Just it was heavy to know you loved someone else and I wasn’t the lucky one. This is what I told him and it made him react. Next thing I know, Yone took me to your bedroom and you know the rest. »

It was really peculiar to hear and see. Yi seemed to regret a lot of things but at the same time it gave them the perfect occasion, the outcome was still good so no reason to feel bad. In that muffled mood Yi took his hand and held it, rubbing his palm. All of it made Yasuo a bit emotional, there was a lot he didn’t know about the latter, especially about what he felt all this time. _‘The lucky one’_. He was close to cry on this again. How strange to hear such a thing when he was convinced he had no chance and now Yi clearly said he believed there was someone else.

If anything, it made him squeeze Yi’s hand, returning to lean against his shoulder. Now that he had him, he would never let go. At the occasion, something came to his mind.

« Yi ? Can you stay for the night ? » Yasuo wasn’t sure he would accept but this was all he wanted.

« I would love to but I’m worried about your health. I still have classes tomorrow morning, I risk to wake you up by mistake. »

« No, please…I don’t care, I’ll still be able to sleep even after that. Please Yi, having you here will help me to sleep. » Maybe he could try to give a sad gaze, although he doubted it would work. Yasuo still made an attempt.

As result Yi grinned and this was really enough to brighten his day : « Oh no need to look so sad, please. I will stay, worry not. » Finished with a light kiss. « Just I’ll have to get ready for bed. I’ll be back soon enough. »

Fair warning for a move, at least it didn’t startle Yasuo. Still, he was a little sad to let Yi go even for such short time. Just wait.

With his typical gentleness Yi parted and got up. As soon he leaned and gave a peck to Yasuo’s forehead, a small thing to keep him patient.

_Oh…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> still a lot of fluff to get out~


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey!  
> MORE FLUFF, LET'S GO
> 
> thanks for reading <3

_It’s done, it’s said_. Yi couldn’t believe it yet as he made his way out of Yasuo’s bedroom. Just before they had been kissing like teens, to the point when he almsot forgot himself. No doubt he was still blushing a little after the interruption. On reflex as he went, Yi tried to brush away the tears, not to let anything to show. Useless indeed but despite the happy tone now, stupid urges came back for being caught in such chaste moment.

Maybe he needed that moment to clear a little his thoughts and stay calm. Part of him expected Yone to be not far of the door once he got out. It would be understandable, his little brother’s life was potentially at stake. Their conversation could have changed a lot of things and it did, hopefully. Aside, no doubt Yone had see what they were doing when he tumbled noisily in the bedroom and this was a good clue on the outcome. _Ahhh_. The blush definitely wouldn’t come off.

Once he was outside, Yi didn’t find the latter around directly. Alright. However this wouldn’t last, Yone had every right to know if Yasuo would recover, which depended of the conversation.

Indeed, as soon as Yi returned to the couch where his laptop was left, a few steps were heard and announced Yone – since the third person here could only be in bed.

« So ?! How are doing the lovebirds ? » Not even trying to be quiet, Yone was beaming as he leaned on the couch, all ears. Obviously the news went fast.

_Oh god_. Yi should have expected such enthusiasm but it was really something to see it. After all, if everything went well, Yasuo would now make a full recovery, opposite of what was going to happen a few months later if there was no moves.

Gathering his stuff, Yi still sat down to explain, mixed between relief, odd fluster and the anticipation of having found love : « He’s fine, at least it looks like it. We…sorted this out, he should be alright from now. »

« So you told him ? All good ? » Again there was so much emotion when Yone asked, so glad.

« Y-Yes, he knows. Why do you ask ? You saw… » No need to finish that. Yi really felt that blush taking over when there was no use. Of course Yone would know.

« Yeah sorry, I couldn’t stay idle for hours, he’s still my little bro and I care about you two. Just wanted to know and…oh my god it’s so cool ! Thank you ! » Quick to hug Yi again, perfectly conveying the joy of family being out of death risk.

_Oh…_ Yi accepted him, feeling a bit like dragged from one thing to another. Who would have known ? Not even an hour ago he was so upset about serious issues like the possible death of his dear friend and now Yone was hugging him strongly for having ‘saved’ his brother’s life.

« Wait, it’s not over yet. He still has to go to the doctor to be sure it’s healing. I have no idea how it is supposed to go. » Just to be sure because Yi was honest, he didn’t know a thing about hanahaki and what it was did when feelings ended up being requited. It couldn’t simply go away in a few seconds.

Yone let him go, still quite happy about the whole thing. That one was going to struggle to sleep, it was sure. Also Yi thought about Yasuo, waiting for him in his bed. _I should move soon_.

« Yes, don’t worry. I’ll have him go or write tomorrow, at least to inform the doctor about it. But thanks, I owe you forever. »

« No, don’t think that…Had it been a bit later, all would be reversed and I’d have suffered the same thing. We can just be happy that it turned out fine before it truly hurt Yasuo. More than it already did. »

After that Yone did go a little quiet, at least more quiet than before. Clearly he was still very glad and happy, just this latest comment made him pause. The smile remained, nothing could eraze the joy of this evening.

« We’d never know. For now I’m happy for both of you and I honestly hope everything will get better for Yasuo. It can’t worsen now. »

There was more left unsaid but Yi didn’t exactly have the time to ask and unpack everything. This would be for another day, another talk. They had all the time they wanted now.

After a good nod he spoke softly : « I hope too. Now I’ll get ready for bed, he’s waiting. » No idea if he could say that or not, it was still their privacy.

« Go on, I won’t hold you back for too long. Enjoy your time~. » With a small gesture to say goodnight, Yone returned at whatever activity he had before. The tone gave away a hint of teasing, obviously he knew what was going on.

« Goodnight. »

Yi wasn’t so sure what to think of that but it was just positive, nothing to fear. Feeling his face heat up, he grabbed his things and took it back to his own bedroom. _Quick, quick._ It hadn’t been too long but he prefered not to spend too long far from Yasuo. As if all this was a dream and as soon as he came back it would shatter in thousand pieces. His brain still had to catch on.

So it was with a lot of haste that Yi made it to the bathroom, after having changed for his night clothes. Usually he wasn’t so hurried but right now he had reasons to go and be somewhere else. In no time it was done and at last he could join Yasuo, taking his phone with him.

Small knock at the door, by habit : « Yasuo, it’s me. » Technically this was what they usually did but now Yi didn’t know if he could skip that. The latter expected him.

Indeed just after the knock Yasuo answered : « Come in ! » It ended up quite muffled but enough to be heard.

As soon Yi came in and closed the door behind him. The light was still on in here and when he looked for Yasuo, he found him unsurprisingly at the same spot, rolled in his blanket in bed. What a dear view. His heart made a happy loop, very glad to find him again. The latter was gazing at him from where he lied in bed, small gesture to ask him closer. No need to ask twice, Yi reached his bed and sat at the edge.

« Hey. » How could he hold back ? Without thinking his tone always turned soft since he first confessed. Gently he took Yasuo’s hand and squeezed a little, a mere sign that he was there. Innerly it was also a way to check all this was real. The tired grin he earned in return was worth everything.

« Hey… » Small whisper, a contrast to when he had called him in but again, he was probably quite tired and impacted by the disease. Hopefully joy made him look better, as if it was a cure in itself.

Getting emotional again, Yi carressed his hair before putting his alarm for next morning. « Alright, I’ll switch off the light. »

After a quick look he could see that indeed Yasuo was ready for the night, a water bottle on the floor by the bed and small place to put any flowers. Yi’s phone was left not far either. Just a few seconds to get up and back to bed for the light then it was good. When he returned, Yasuo had opened the blanket for him, with some space to sleep. Yi joined him gladly, immediately comforted by the warmth of the blanket.

And yet it was nothing like being hugged tightly by his dear love, almost a sudden move. Yasuo lost no time and took any kind of contact possible, legs tangled. It was perfect and the whole haste and affection guiding these hands made Yi so endeared.

« Precious… » It escaped him, a mere statement of the obvious cuteness he had never expected.

In such lack of light, it was barely possible to see each other, just to suppose and let hands wander a little to be sure. And yet he was sure Yasuo was looking at him, with the most dear look possible. Yi wished there was more light but that would do.

« Unfair… » Small word left there.

It didn’t seem to be followed until Yi felt the latter’s hands touching his face, the only warning before it was replaced by an eager mouth. There was some fumbling to truly find each other, a few fails that landed on his cheek instead but soon enough Yasuo managed to kiss him. Right then, everything was given, along a small noise in that passionate exchange.

It last forever, except they needed to breathe, especially Yasuo. It came to an end but not contact, everything else remained. So sweet to feel the latter in his arms, moving from time to time to properly relish contact. Soon Yi noticed how he was settling down for good, at least not yet. Yasuo felt a bit restless.

« Are you doing fine ? » So low, as long as it was enough to be heard. Worry was still there, in case it was serious. Yi had no idea how nights went for the latter with everything going on.

« Oh errr yes, don’t worry. » A small pause followed with obvious fluster or maybe an awkward hint. « Ahhh I know it’s dumb but I’m just trying the best position to cuddle. »

Even cuter than he expected and far from any risks. Yi chuckled softly, letting the embrace rather loose to give him some freedom to move. _Adorable_.

« It’s alright, do as you wish. »

Very cautiously he still leaned closer to kiss Yasuo, even as it most likely risked to fall on his cheek. It was fine and indeed he didn’t aim so bad. A small gasp was heard.

« Fuck…You’re too cute… » With that came another hasty kiss, while Yasuo kept his hands on the latter’s cheek to be sure not to miss.

Indeed what a sweet thing. Yi gave in and deepened it when he could, basking in the easiness of a move he would have never asked before. Wonderful how everything could change.

That one didn’t last so long, surely because Yasuo had something else on his mind. Indeed, once it was over, he returned to this restless change of position until he would find a good one. In Yi’s opinion, everything was good but he would leave him the choice. As long as he had Yasuo here, he wouldn’t complain.

« Maybe would you like to spoon ? » Mere suggestion, if that could help.

« Ah, maybe another time. I want to face you… »

There went Yi’s heart, filled with rainbows after such dear thing. Difficult not to press Yasuo down to cover him in affection. He wanted to give him everything.

« Then we will. Take all the time you need. »

To be fair, it didn’t bother him in the slightest. Sleep would come in time and this was still earlier than Yi would do usually. So for now he relaxed in bed, an arm slung around the latter as he searched a good spot. _He will exhaust himself though._ Easy to see that coming.

It didn’t miss. After a good minute or two of rolling over and changing again and again, Yi started to notice a certain tiredness until Yasuo really got quiet and sighed. _Bingo_. A small pause then came the final moves, as he guessed. The latter ended up snuggled against him, face resting against Yi’s neck. Really cute. As soon it gave him an urge of protection, closing the embrace now that it was settled.

« Good ? » From everything he felt, it was clearly good but he prefered to ask.

« Mmmh yes. Thanks… »

Oh Yasuo really sounded tired. Yi gave him a small peck at the top of his head since it was the closest.

« Goodnight, love. Don’t fret about waking me up if anything happens, I’ll help. Sleep well… »

« G-Goodnight… »

That short fluster was cute to notice. For a time Yi wondered if the pet name was a msitake but if really it bothered Yasuo, he would have told so. Still, this was to be asked later, not when the latter was so tired.

Silence came back for good, not to be disturbed. Yi let it happen, glad to be right there with a sleepy Yasuo in his arms. That was when reality hit and he realized it again. Yasuo loved him too.

_Oh dear…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> never enough fluff <3


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey!  
> you know what this is? the moment when i stop hoping for a quick ending xD take that, it will last as long as i need to give the fluff xD
> 
> thanks for reading!!

_Love…_

What a sweet thing to be called. A mere word and yet Yasuo cherished it with all his heart. Right then, after some time spent looking for the best place to sleep, he could relax. Yi was here, all of it was real. The confession still rang in his mind, making him so happy innerly. It was sleep time though, he had to stay quiet so instead he held tightly the latter, enough to show him his love.

Part of him was a bit worried to bother Yi but it seemed that he was more than glad to be right here. Yasuo would never say no to this, especially now that he was snuggled up to him. If he focused enough, he could sense Yi’s heartbeat. So soothing. His only fear was to wake him up in the night, for he was too aware how loud it could be when he coughed. Sadly this happened very often because of the disease and even now as it already felt reduced, it was likely to happen. _I hope no_. Yasuo had to accept the risk. At least he had Yi with him, he must understand how difficult it was for him.

_My love…_

In that series of sweet thoughts and blushing moments of realization, Yasuo finally fell asleep, pressed to the latter.

~

If one thing was supposed to happen, then nothing could stop it. Somewhen in the night Yasuo woke up, coughing suddenly. It was as awful as the beginning, a bit like choking until the flowers weren’t in the way anymore. Specially wicked to endure that during his sleep, since it would wake him up and make him panick even for a few seconds.

_Oh shit._

Only when he met some resistance in his moves did he realize Yi’s presence. The latest night’s memories came back as quick, making him a mess of emotions. This wasn’t a dream, it was real life. Then he realized how loud he had been right next to the latter, so quite impossible to be discreet. So he stayed there, completely still.

A good minute went without a single move, trying to find if Yi’s breathing was calm enough to be indeed asleep. It seemed so. Yasuo sighed, relaxing a little. _That was close._ Really a wonder how the latter could still sleep through this. Anyway, this was for the best, he didn’t bother him.

Very slowly Yasuo tried to put the few flowers away on the bedside table. A bit difficult since he had to prevent anything but he still made it. Really, it made him so emotional to register Yi’s embrace around him, even while he reached out of bed. Everything would make him cry, almost.

Equally slowly he returned to his rightful place in Yi’s arms, trying not to disturb his rest while he got back in that comfy spot against the latter’s chest. Perfect. Then he could hold him again, gently.

_Oh my god…._

It would still take a few days to realize.

~

Sadly these special wakings happened several times and Yasuo still wasn’t used to it. Always quite bothering every time. Except right now once the coughing was over, there were a few moves nearby, making him freeze as quick. _Oh no_.

« Yasuo ? » There, so low, barely a murmur in the dark after what seemed to be the noise of Yi turning on his side to face him.

Hands trailed up from his shoulder to his face, surely a way to find him without any accident. Soon enough Yasuo registered the latter’s presence very close to him, maybe enough for a kiss. And yet Yi stayed there, waiting.

« It’s nothing, happens often. Sorry for waking ya. » Another whisper, not ready to make a fuss about this. They should go back to sleep instead.

« Not your fault. Do you need anything ? Water ? »

_Hold me… ?_ He was still so weak to anything from Yi.

« I-I’ll have some, yes please. Then cuddles… ? » Always that drop each time he tried to seem normal. How could Yi’s presence make him feel so much ? Maybe it was just the new side of these feelings.

Without waiting Yi moved and there was the light fumbling of someone looking for a water nearby. It didn’t last, quickly Yasuo was handed the bottle with care because of the lack of light.

« Here. »

After taking some and feeling a little better, he went to put it back himself which implied lying over Yi since he was between him and the edge of the bed. Maybe not very practical but it was an excuse to get close and the latter said nothing of it, welcoming in his arms when he understood.

Yasuo was so happy with himself, staying right here would be nice but he was aware it could potentially be exhausting for Yi to bear a dead weight. So he lied there a little, enjoying it as much as he could before retreating to a much better position. The latter didn’t follow as quick and jsut after, there was a burst of light from a phone screen.

_Ah !_

On reflex he went to hide his face in the blanket, this was too much at once.

« Sorry, I should have warned. Just wanted to check the time. » Yi did sound a bit guilty, returning to hold him close.

« It’s fine, it’s fine. » More than fine actually, now he could cuddle with Yi in peace.

After some moves to properly settle for sleep, there were discreet touches until it became clear Yi was looking for his face. _Oh…_ Yasuo tried to mirror the gesture, coming closer until indeed they kissed.

Really that was becoming his favorite thing to do. Yi could be so tender, it made him both incredibly happy and overly emotional for a mere kiss. Yasuo seeked more, in the limits of their drowsy states. Barely a hint of tongue. Soon enough he felt half asleep already, close to fall again even in the middle of a kiss. No doubt Yi noticed, parting to welcome him in a tight hug.

Hopefully he wouldn’t wake up more times in the night.

_Darling…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for real, i'll stop soon to go on an explicit following of this fic xD


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey!!  
> fluff time~
> 
> thanks for reading <3

_He’s so cute, it shouldn’t be allowed._

This was Yi’s second thought for this day, right after grumbling a little because of the hateful time to get up. Just before his alarm had rang and he managed to cut it quick enough not to bother Yasuo. blessedly he was still asleep, clinging to Yi. The origin of this dear thought, to find the latter so close to him after all this time thinking it would never be requited. He had the proof right there, they had just spent the night together.

A good minute went without moving in the dim room. It was so nice just to sit there in bed, Yasuo’s arms around him in that small attempt at keeping this warm body close to him. Yi indulged a little and brushed his cheek carefully. It would be a shame to wake him up. _Better not._ Yasuo was still sick and surely it would take time to fully recover. So now it was his mission to take care of him, to pamper him a little. His affection was impossible to suppress, especially after holding back for so long.

So to say, it was difficult not to seek more and lean closer, just enough for a kiss. It would be delightful and yet another occasion to both show his love and make sure this was real. Yi still kept himself from doing so. _I have to move_. Plus it wasn’t worth the risk waking Yasuo up.

A bit sad, he started the dangerous task of extracting himself of the embrace without causing anything. Difficult but he still made it, aware of any change in the latter’s sleep. Then he took his phone and got out.

This day he was the one starting the earliest. Beautiful friday. The sun wasn’t even up. Perfect for his mood. A sigh escaped him as he made his way to the kitchen for breakfast. In less than an hour Yone would get up too, at last another soul in this silent flat. Yasuo wouldn’t get up for classes today because it had been a good week since he couldn’t attend anymore. Doctor’s order. At that point, the disease wasn’t at its worst and he could still function and get up if needed but rest was extremely advised. Well, Yasuo wouldn’t have tried to go to class against that order. And now since the latest development they could hope for a good recovery.

_He should see the doctor soon_. At least to know how it was supposed to go. This wasn’t some flu, he could have died if there was no decision made. One less thing to worry about. Yi could now stay rather peaceful and enjoy their new love. What a splendid news to start the day on. It left him smiling like an idiot. _Love…_

A few times he caught himself lingering on these things, while he was supposed to get ready for the day. But what a better feeling than knowing that Yasuo was potentially out of danger and that he had surely won a boyfriend at the occasion.

_Boyfriends ?_

It wasn’t discussed yet but he could imagine. Yasuo wouldn’t have developped this disease with unrequited feelings if it was a mere infatuation. It was that deep and it left Yi wondering shyly. He wished he had known earlier but now he knew, they both knew. They were free to try and discover.

These thoughts followed him through his routine, softly following Yasuo even as he couldn’t see him yet. Waiting till the afternoon was going to be long, making Yi rather sad by advance. Although maybe now he could hope to get a few messages from the latter during the day, at least to check on him.

Some time later Yone did appear, obviously not very glad to be awake before the sun neither. At least at that time coffee was ready. Even Yone needed some time to properly wake up. The good news was that he didn’t need as much than his brother.

After some chatting, both resumed their routines. It was still nice to see his friend so happy about the evening and the ‘little’ changes. Quite understandable, his little brother wasn’t dying any longer, a good reason to be cheerful despite the harsh time after waking early.

Now Yi had a bit more time to spend before leaving. This was his habit, always a good margin to catch up with any news or just to chat with the other two. Since it was the first morning after the confession, it quickly became difficult to stay still in the living room or his own bedroom without going to see Yasuo. So close and yet Yi didn’t know if it was a good idea. _He needs to rest_.

Minutes went one by one and he watched all this go. Would it truly bother ? Thinking a little on the reverse side, he would have liked to be woken up to say goodbye so maybe Yasuo would. Soon Yone went on his merry way so Yi seized the occasion to ask him his opinion. Really, all this was dumb but he wanted to know.

« Hey, do you think I can go see Yasuo to say goodbye ? I don’t want him to be mad or sad or anything but I don’t know, maybe it’s not a good idea. »

The latter gave him such a surprised look, that quickly turning into endearment : « Awww no that’s fine, go on. We bother each other quite often plus I don’t think he’ll ever be mad at you, especially for this. He’ll be on a better mood for sure. »

That was true. For the rare holidays they got, it happened that any of the two went to wake up the other, simply because they knew there was still more time to sleep afterward. They had the respect not to pull such a prank on each other during class week, this would be a tragedy for their sleep schedules.

« Alright, alright. »

A bit unsure, Yi still made it to Yasuo bedroom. Stopping right there before coming in, he asked himself again and again. _Yone says it’s fine._ And honestly Yi needed to see the latter at least one last time before leaving.

Quietly he opened the door and went inside, closing it quickly. Some light filtered through the window as the day was up, making it much easier to spot Yasuo. By reflex Yi closed distance and sat on the floor near the bed.

_Beautiful_.

He may have been a little biased but it was his truth, Yasuo was gorgeous, even right now, all disheveled and peaceful. It became suddenly very hard not to surrender and kiss him, now that he was so close. _Soon_.

Gently Yi reached for him, carressing his face in a first attempt to see if that would wake him up. Innerly he was a bit anxious, scared of making a mistake right now. This didn’t work though, Yasuo merely rolled on his side making him fully face Yi. _Oh_. Another attempt, this time he shook his shoulder lightly.

It worked. First there were a few moves to stretch, along a yawn and then Yi’s gaze met chocolate eyes, still a bit sleepy. So much affection came up, he cursed innerly. He’s so adorable. Because after a few seconds, recognition arrived and Yasuo grinned softly, settling back after this waking.

« Hey… » Quite low, typical from the moments when Yasuo was woken up too early for him. Yet the tone was so sweet, very glad.

« Good morning, beautiful. Sorry, I probably shouldn’t have woken you up but this was the only occasion to see each other before tonight. How do you feel ? »

Yasuo didn’t even look outraged or anything for being woken up, probably because he was still half-way through it and would fall again in no time. Still, he was more than nice, reaching gently for Yi.

« Am fine. It doesn’t hurt as much. Mmmh don’t worry, I think I’d have sulked if you had left without kissing me goodbye… »

Alright, that was even more cute. Yi’s heart was already so close to give up, too much love. Without even thinking he took Yasuo’s hand and gave a long peck to the back, keeping eye contact. That would convey his feelings on the moment.

« Oh… » If a blush could be heard.

Yi swore he saw that light red color the latter’s cheeks in the following seconds after registering the gesture. He wouldn’t be able to stay here for too long but he could make each second count.

« Thank you, for letting me. » Yi was grateful to be allowed this.

It was wonderful to see the impact of words in the good sense. Yasuo looked a bit more awake and so touched. Yi decided he couldn’t hold back anymore, at last going for that kiss both wanted. Met half-way, it only made it better. In no time Yasuo tried to hold him, grab whatever he could reach to urge him back in bed. Low hunger bubbled up, the early passion. _Good…_ Yi wished he could stay here all day. The latter’s hands behind his head, over his shoulder, always keeping him closer. This was their bubble of peace.

A pause came when Yasuo parted, staring at him straight in the eyes : « Say it please…Say that you love me… »

Out of nowhere or maybe not ? Yi couldn’t know but this seemed really important for Yasuo, from that gaze a bit desperate along such urgent moves. It stung just for a second to remember the latter believed this to be unrequited. No doubt it would take more than one night to heal the wounds.

Yi held his face with infinite care and spoke these words he believed to the end : « I love you. Always. »

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright, i think it will take at max 20 chapters. then we'll go on the smut fic xD


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!!  
> more fluff!!! (will it end one day?)
> 
> thanks for reading, hope you'll like it!

This was far too early to cry but damn Yasuo wasn’t already to close. After all, it was his ‘fault’ for asking, of course Yi would tell him.

_He loves me..._

It seemed that he would need a few more days to fully register that. Hopefully the latter wouldn’t be mad at him for that, he was one of the most patient persons Yasuo knew. Plus right now he looked so genuine, cradling his face as he gave his love once more. Honesty was beautiful.

« I love you too… » All that he could manage before this new wave of feelings overwhelmed him.

As distraction Yasuo kissed him urgently, doing as much as he could to keep the latter close to him. This would be difficult, Yi was already clothed for yet another day of classes, obviously he would soon leave. No matter how desperate he was, Yasuo didn’t want to bother him to that point. At least he got a few kisses and another confession.

Determined to keep him as long as possible, he clung to Yi even for this kiss. And oh it was already so precious to feel the latter push back in that exchange, doing his part all in sweetness. Yasuo wished they could spend all the day right there, kissing their love away until it was enough to realize they were now together. For his part at least it would take time, Yi maybe too.

A break was still required, both of them parting but only because they had too. Looking at Yi, he was struck by such dreamy gaze. His now. This obvious love was for him. _I love him so much…_ One morning ago felt like every other mornings, sad despair about unrequited feelings. Always the same pain for seeing Yi everyday, oblivious to this repressed love. And it was requited.

Sudden thought on this topic. Yi loved him too and it couldn’t have happened overnight. Yasuo had no idea how it had been and the latter had said it was enough to vent to Yone. Now he couldn’t help but feel bad about it, at least sad for knowing that Yi had suffered too. He saw him right now, so tender and happy, worried about waking him up. Yasuo wanted to ask, to know about how it was. _Later, later…_

Although it was clear Yi wasn’t completely done, leaning closer to give a few breathless pecks where he could. Most of it tickled gently Yasuo’s neck and shoulder, far too glad to be the target of such affection to react. On the contrary, he encouraged it.

A few words were whispered to him, like small secrets meant to calm everything for the day. Love, gorgeous, dear, it never ended. As if it wasn’t enough, Yi had kept his hand, rubbing his palm slowly, all too kind.

After a few minutes this had to end, sadly. There was a small move as Yi checked his phone, surely for the time, then spoke to him closely.

« I apologize, I really have to go soon. Please, try to see your doctor, for me. Text me whenever you want, even for nothing. » With that Yi rose enough to give him a worried gaze, always tinted with a lot of love. His hand lingered over Yasuo’s cheek before he bent for a last kiss.

That one was so slow, relishing the instant as much as they could. Yasuo did try to keep him near but the pace remained extremely tender. When Yi parted it was for good, squeezing his hand before he let go.

_No…_

« Yi… »

It was a little unfair, neither had a choice right now. Yasuo didn’t go further, it would be cruel. Instead he tried to catch Yi’s hand while he stood, just in time to give a small peck to it. Equivalence.

« I’ll see you tonight. Take care and text me. »

This small smile was worth everything in the world. No way to be mad or sad after that.

« Goodbye… »

« Goodbye love… »

A few steps, short waving goodbye and then the door was closed. After having supported himself up for these last moments, now Yasuo let himself collapse back in bed, gaze lost on the door of his bedroom.

_He’s gone._

Paying attention, he could tell Yi wasn’t truly out of the flat, there hadn’t been any noise from the locks of the main door. For a time Yasuo wondered if he had any energy. This would have been great to get up and run to catch the latter in his arms as small surprise but now he wasn’t sure if he could. Despite the lessening strain over his health, the hanahaki had made him quite weak all this time. A sudden big effort wasn’t reasonable, no matter how affectionate he felt.

Time went and indeed there was the noise of the main door being unlocked, opened then closed, along a few muffled words from outside his bedroom. No way to know what was said, it was barely enough to know someone spoke. Surely Yi and Yone, since they had to go to classes.

Overthinking was useless, now the occasion was gone even though it wasn’t likely he would have seized it. The mere possibility made him sad. Yet he could find another way. Following his reflex, Yasuo looked for his phone and indeed messaged the latter, had he just gotten out of the building.

**[love u]**

**[take care u2]**

**[i wish we could just cuddle all day]**

It was so strange to see the latest messages, from a time when they both believed these feelings had no chance. A little bittersweet to remember that. His old self would be more than delighted to know this was in fact requited and he would survive, with Yi as boyfriend nonetheless. This was a living dream.

_Boyfrieeeeeeeeeeend…._ What a wonderful thing. Yasuo wasn’t dumb, he still had to check about that but clearly the way Yi went all sweet with him, it couldn’t be nothing. More likely a start of relationship.

Leaving his phone nearby, he paid attention to the smallest noise, impatient. At that time Yi still had to get to his university, it wasn’t quick. So surely he could reply to his text. Maybe. Yasuo hoped silently, before being interrupted by a fit of coughing.

Was it him or facts ? It felt like it was already reduced. Probably a lot of it was just his mind being free of the horrible struggle between confessing or not. Yet it was as if it got lifted from him. A few flowers still went with it but Yasuo wasn’t mad anymore about it. Funny how he had hated it for so long and now he looked at it with a strange feeling. Not bad or good, just contemplation.

All this was cut short when his phone buzzed lightly for a message. _Oh !_

**[You’re fast. I’m glad to hear from you and to be honest, I wish the same. I suggest tonight when I get back home we take some time to cuddle. A small celebration for the weekend.]**

**[I love you too, dear. With all my heart.]**

Awwwwwwwwwww…

Obviously Yi wasn’t done giving him affection. Yasuo hoped it would never end.

_Precious babe…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aight, i think we'll get to the weekend and then it might slip into more adult topics XD


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey!  
> another update! guess what? more fluff!!
> 
> thanks for reading <3

Just a few messages not long after he had left home and now Yi was smiling fondly, despite the mood of early classes. _What a cutie_. First to receive a message was good and now he could just melt under the small affection sent. Yasuo was really sweet even when he didn’t try to. Another thing discovered.

Yi still had a bit of walk before getting to his university so it gave him time to text the latter and enjoy these small things of daily life. From the confession everything would have to be explored and experienced, even the most trivial things. A sort of new point of view and possibilities. I want more. And no doubt he would get it. This was just the beginning.

Not even a full minute after he sent his message, another one already arrived, making him check as quick. _Oh!_

**[...u’re so cute, it’s so unfair]**

**[cant wait to have u back]**

**[and yes! cuddles!]**

**[careful with ur promises, ill keep u forever!]**

Each messaged gave another notification, Yi could just see these arrive one by one, filling his heart with a lot of affection. It just showed how much he had been missing all this time when they didn’t even know about it. Wonderful.

**[I’ll stay no matter how long you want, love. After a day at uni it will help a lot.]**

**[Yasuo, is it fine to call you love? Or anything similar? I have no idea what you prefer about pet names.]**

This was an honest question. He’d rather not make any mistakes, even though he would say that Yasuo seemed the kind to use a lot of pet names. _Just in case._

**[omg]**

**[yes pls]**

**[anything]**

**[I guess that ur fine if I use them too?]**

So fast, always. After all, Yasuo had a lot of time and maybe he didn’t go back to sleep so soon. _Oh no_. Possibly he couldn’t now, as he was too awake for that. Yi hoped he wasn’t keeping him from it.

Between the conversation and his walk to university, it was quite a lot of attention. At least he could focus. Just he went a little faster, to be sure to be there on time, although it was always the case. Once there he would be able to relax a little and text Yasuo until classes.

The reply was equally nice. At least that was said, they could use it. Yi made sure to communicate that, very glad to unleash this future tenderness.

**[Of course, love. I’d love that too.]**

**[Tell me, I hope you’re not trying to stay awake just to text me. Go back to sleep if you need to. I prefer to know you healthy.]**

Better be sure. Yi was quite tempted to send a text to Yone, just so he would remind his brother but before leaving he had already left a note in the kitchen and on the couch. _Maybe too much but it’s for his good_. For a few months he had known his dear love deathly sick, all he wanted now was to clear this.

**[nah, im fine]**

**[i prefer to text u <3]**

**[but yeah still a bit tired]**

_What a stubborn one._ Yi understood but he wished the latter would just enjoy his rest when he could.

**[Then go to sleep, dear. This way you’ll have enough energy for the cuddles tonight.]**

He had to be smart if he wanted to convince Yasuo. Hopefully he would ba already rather sleepy, no need to give a lot of reasons. To know the latter had last that long in the morning was impressive.

**[good point]**

**[aight, gonna sleep~]**

**[see ya later bby!]**

There, victory. _Good_.

**[Take care, love. I’ll always try to answer during the day. Lot of love <3]**

The only downside was that indeed from now Yi wouldn’t hear from the latter for a few hours, if not more. Really that was difficult to predict, Yasuo was good at passing out for a long time. The disease could be playing at the moment but even when he was fine he slept at least till noon.

Inner sigh for this but on the other side it meant this afternoon he would have a lively Yasuo, in the limits of the disease. And if everything went good, then maybe they would even know about the hanahaki and its state.

_Be reasonable, love. All will be alright._

For now he had to wait until his classes began but it was fine, he had a lot of soft memories to cherish. The sweet mood wasn’t close to end.

~

As he had thought, Yi hadn’t heard about Yasuo for some time. It last until around 1 in the afternoon, while himself was taking his lunch break in one of the student restaurants. A very cheerful Yasuo had just hopped back in their conversation, always so adorable. Probably this was love at work and it made everything cute but Yi was glad nonetheless.

The day went well. He was on a very good mood and almost every time he checked his phone there were a few messages for him. Between classes they chatted a little, always something to say even if most of time it was pet names and loving words. They had to, impossible to resist that.

One of the moments to remember – if they had to pick one – was when it was made clear they were in for the long run. It had started rather clumsily by a question from Yasuo and it ended on a few messages full of heart emojis when it was stated and agreed, they were boyfriends. Yi had to stop himself from smiling this was too much and his fellow classmates may notice anything.

Hour after hour, time got too long. It was getting tiring to wait for weekend. Obviously that wasn’t just Yi’s case, there was actually no one in this place that wished to work a few more days before weekend. Hopefully that evening everyone was free, unless they had Saturday classes. Not his case.

Another pause in the conversation happened later. Yi wasn’t so surprised but he still noticed the lack of answer for a time. Later Yasuo was quick to come back and explain, having found enough energy to get an express visit to the doctor. Usually it didn’t work so fast but for his disease, it was understandable. So now they knew and Yasuo was so happy in his messages. Everything so far showed he was rather alright. He wasn’t back to health yet but so to say, it had stop worsening which was some big news. That evening they would celebrate.

When it was time and the last hour was over, Yi couldn’t have felt better. Soon he would find again Yasuo after hours and hours spent texting and sighing for his far love. Lovesick indeed but he had the right. Not so long ago each time he came back home it was to find Yasuo grumpy and closing himself little by little because of the hanahaki. Now it was the opposite, he would walk back home and find his now boyfriend waiting for the weekend cuddles.

Life couldn’t be sweeter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright, fair warning: i'm coming back home so i have no idea if i'll be able to update as often as i do when i'm in my tiny student room. i'll try my bestbut i can't guaranty anything


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey!  
> hell yeah, another day with update!! gotta keep going!
> 
> thanks for reading, you're so kind <3

_Oh my god, soon !_

Really, Yasuo felt like a kid on his birthday. It was long gone, in fact but Yi’s return was very very soon. A matter of minutes. The latter had texted him as soon as he was free – even though they hadn’t really stopped all day – which gave the signal before his return. No way to stay calm.

For some time already Yasuo had moved to the living room, staying a bit lazily on the couch with his blanket waiting for anything to happen. He knew Yone would be home before Yi at least, later in the end of afternoon. His only distractions were his phone and laptop.

Nothing else would do the trick. He was in love, freshly cleared of any threats over his health and soon enough his now boyfriend would come back for some cuddles.

_Cuddles…_

The mere thought was enough to make him roll happily on the couch, almost giggling like a teen. Not a real problem but yes, he’d rather seem cool with the others. Not to push Yi away on accident. _Baby…_ Oh he loved him so much and soon they would be together after a tortuously long day.

_Faster, faster._ He still tried to hold back a little, no need to spam the latter. No doubt Yi was already quite motivated to come back home. Yet Yasuo’s impatience was great too. Sweet conflict. Checking the time would made him mad second by second, no need to try. 

A  few minutes went by and he was so close to surrender.  _Damnit_ . At least Yi couldn’t really know how desperate he was right now, or maybe yes because he was still good at figuring things out. 

Agonizing on the couch, Yasuo tried to distract himself a little. But all he managed to do was thinking about these cuddles. Of course Yi meant something innocent, a good spooning in bed with a few tender words. That was without taking in count Yasuo’s tendency to drift on hotter topics. It could be a little confusing and his sex drive would just agree after that long time yearning alone.

_I don’t think he meant that_. Yet the idea remained, leaving him a little longing for warmth and relief. As much as he considered a simple kiss a luxury, this was outrageously out of reach. Was it ? Would Yi allow this ?

Not even the time to give into this slow craving, there was the distinct noise of keys in the lock of the main door breaking the silence of the flat.

_YES !_

That was it, at last Yi was home. Without waiting Yasuo got up – despite the light weakness – and made it to the door, at the same time that the latter got inside.

« Babyyyyyyyyyyy ! »

« Hello hello ! » No time lost. Yi’s grin was beautiful when he caught his boyfriend in his arms, hugging him without questions.

_He’s here…_ Another thing he had wished to do for so long, a proper welcome back home. It was worth everything, even more because he could tell how happy Yi was. The grasp betrayed this gentle urgence to be close again and while he made sure to lock the door behind him, the latter couldn’t help kissing him.

This embrace got passionnate very quickly, especially when Yi’s hands were free. Now he could hold Yasuo with certain strenght, taking him to lean against the door. Himself just noticed when indeed they came in contact with it, cold surface compared to the warm body pressed to his.

It was just the beginning. Once this kiss was properly finished, Yasuo parted and gave such cheerful gaze, hopeful for next move. _Cuddles !_

« Come, I’ve been waiting for this all day… » Not to complain or anything, of course. Yasuo was just really touch starved and this was exactly what he needed.

« Just a second, love. I just got back. » Very sweet even for this, Yi gave a hard peck to his cheek before indeed getting on this short routine.

Yasuo made sure to leave him some room, even though he’d rather have his hands all over him than no contact. Still, patience was important. Also Yi was obviously hurrying to get his shoes off, carrying his bag to his bedroom. As soon as he took this direction Yasuo followed, ready to hug him without escape. Yi didn’t even complain, it was wonderful.

« My bed or yours ? » Barely a whisper since they were already quite close.

« Mmmh yours ? We’re already here. »

Indeed it made sense but everyone could chose a preferred way. Yasuo didn’t really care, as long as he got his boyfriend in his arms. While he nuzzled closer it hit him that in fact he had almost never been in Yi’s bedroom. _Oh yes, damn_. Instincts were good sometimes, he had followed without thinking. Quick look around while Yi finished tidying a little.

Not that it was a sort of forbidden temple but he had the rather normal reflex not to bother anyone in their privacy. Yone a little less, brothers would still find a way to prank a little but for Yi, he hadn’t tried to stay here more than required before. Also because of the ‘crush’ and a lot of bullshit. No need to add more salt on the wound.

So many things around, lot of trivial details but the mere fact to know it was Yi’s bedroom made it special. Surely Yasuo zoned out a little because he focused back when the latter called for him gently. Without registering any of it, Yi had them sat in bed and probably Yasuo had been too caught up to notice.

Now his boyfriend had his full attention, cradling his face with a lot of gentleness. _Darling…_ Yasuo didn’t even wait for the kiss to be given, he crossed that gap and claimed him breathless. So much for patience. A light chuckle came up in his attention, something all so sweet. He wished he could dedicate everything to memory.

Hands were quick to wonder a little, to grab other places and be sure they wouldn’t get away from each other. Even Yi coaxed him further, urging him closer until there was no space between them. A little more motivation then they toppled over on the mattress.

_Oww…_

Maybe Yasuo could have seen it happen but it was fine, no harm. Instead they stared at each other in dear surprise, before laughing together. Unfortunate indeed. In no time they were back to kissing, restless hands over each other. A wonder who was more enthusiastic, since both closed distance and made sure to deepen the kiss. Little by little Yasuo ended up on top of the latter, seriously blushing after such attention.

And Yi, oh dear Yi, he didn’t even chuckle or teased for noticing this blush. No, instead he grinned, caressing Yasuo’s face. What a blessed image. _My heart…_ No way to resist. So he just leaned closer and hid his face against Yi’s neck. 

Something like a minute must have gone, or something similar. Silence was broken again by Yi’s voice, asking so quietly : « I didn’t know you could get even cuter. Do you want to stay like this for the cuddles or do you want something more comfortable ? »

Yasuo wished he had something better to reply to that, it was unfair to be unmade by soft words. Instead he kissed Yi’s neck, mind whispering to leave a few marks there but it wasn’t the time or even the question.  _Stop_ .

« Mmmh. Maybe move a little. Spoon ? » Better use less words, it would keep from making a fool of himself.

« Of course, dear.  As you wish. » The tone gave away so much affection while Yi rubbed his back gently, trying to help through this short fluster.

This was up to Yasuo. Not long after he did move, giving a very blushy loving gaze to Yi before he lied down on the mattress and turned his back to him. In no time the latter embraced him from behind, arm laced around his chest in a rather protective manner. 

Only sad thing was the sudden fit of coughing but this still would happen. It didn’t even last long and barely two flowers came from that.  _Shit_ . Alright, it could hurt a little but at least this was one bother less.  Yi held him through this, gentle hand in his hair to soothe the possible pain. Small whispers as he took the flowers from it to put it away on his bedside table. Afterward he returned to hug Yasuo dearly, giving the feeling that he wouldn’t let go.

« Good ? »

Y es, it was. Everything was perfect and now they could cuddle in peace. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmh just a few more before smut~


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!!!  
> another successful update! now let's try to finish this~
> 
> thanks for reading!

Barely a few minutes in and Yi was already so peaceful. This was everything he had been waiting for during his classes, a moment of relaxation with his dear boyfriend. At the occasion, Yasuo was slightly curled up in his bed, clinging to Yi’s arms where it was laced around him. All so lovely, so to say. _Very, very cute_.

If only a few days ago he would have been told he would end up spooning with Yasuo in his own damned bed and that the latter would be the little spoon. This sounded like a dream and yet he had now the solid proof under his hands, clothes covering a warm body he secretly yearned. _No, not now._

This was way out of line, both considering Yasuo’s sad condition and the early state of their relationship. Yi wouldn’t ask, at least not so soon. Indeed this wasn’t the right time, no matter the answer to such ideas.

Instead Yi prefered to focus on the cheer tenderness of such moment. After moving slowly his hand he could sense the latter’s heartbeat, chest heaving with each breath. A worried thought went at the occasion, paying attention to the rhythm in case there was an obvious strain on Yasuo’s breathing. The hanahaki was supposed to be over but it couldn’t be so soon. Anyway this didn’t mean Yi would stop worrying after some time, Yasuo had been clearly sick over him, without even realizing.

_It hurt him…_ If only there was a way to go back in time and confess before Yasuo even showed any signs of the disease. It would have saved them a lot of pain, especially for him.

This sudden wave of sadness made his apologize again for being part of the reasons : « I’m sorry, love. I know there is nothing we can do now to change it but I’m sorry for the pain you had to go through. »

Probably this sounded really out of the blue since Yasuo couldn’t have known what he was thinking about. However Yi had that over his heart and he preferred to say it, following the urge to soothe everything until pain was a far memory. Maybe it was that gentle mood that left him so truthfull, there was nothing to fear. Just to guys in love and glad to be together at last.

For a time there was no reaction from the latter, enough for Yi to think he had fallen asleep. I don’t think so. In that case it would have been very obvious, difficult to miss someone sleeping so close. All that he registered at the moment was Yasuo’s hand over his, keeping contact like a dear thing to be protected.

« It’s fine. Not your fault. » So quiet, all the opposite of Yasuo on the most normal days. This was telling.

« I doubt that. I saw how bad you acted during these months and surely that’s not even close to what you felt. You…you didn’t even consider me loving you back. » This wasn’t meant to happen. Yi was scared this would make him feel guilty. It wasn’t his goal, he just wanted to apologize for being the origin of the issue.

The following silence was heavy. Clearly this discussion wasn’t the best topic to find during cuddles, Yi regretted this choice increasingly. _Too late now_. The least he could hope was that Yasuo wasn’t mad or anything, that wouldn’t do. On reflex Yi held him closer, face resting against the latter’s head.

« I-I thought you would never fall to that. You’re so nice and perfect, you never showed interest in anyone so it was rather stupid to have some hopes… »

_Dear…_ That tone was a little heartbreaking, so lost in painful memories. More than ever Yi wanted to ease the pain, eraze it forever.

All this was probably true, at least in Yasuo’s perception. If it wasn’t then the disease made no sense, of course he had believed Yi to be impossible to reach. To simply imagine this hurt because himself had been close to get sick too in return for these unrequited feelings.

« I’m sorry, I only realized my feelings after you got sick… I would have showed interest if I had know earlier. » It was getting too much. To distract himself a little he kissed Yasuo’s nape, trying all he could to show his affection.

« Oh. I didn’t know that. When did you realize… ? » Curiosity was back. Yasuo moved a little in their embrace, as if to find more contact and to look at him although this position didn’t help.

« I can’t be sure, it feels like so long ago but very young too. It just… happened. I saw you feeling worse by the day and soon I realized my bitterness wasn’t only for the situation but also this lucky person you loved. Someone that wasn’t me. Obviously that wasn’t friendly of me. »

Was it him or Yasuo was laughing ? It shook them gently, despite the rather quiet mood that went with painful topics. _Is it funny ?_ Yi doubted the latter did find that funny, merely it was a reflex about the surreal situation they had gotten stuck into before.

« I can’t believe you were jealous of yourself. That’s so sweet but at the same time I guess you hurt a lot too. I’m sorry baby… »

With that Yasuo actually got out of their embrace to turn around and face Yi, revealing quite an emotional gaze. Accepting him as quick, it wasn’t long before they were back to holding each other and kissing, the raw urge to soothe the harm done even unconciously.

It remained even after the end of the kiss, shyly holding each other to keep this precious. The need to realize.

« Saying it like this can be sweet indeed but soon enough it would have ended up like you, with flowers. Nothing that require you to apologize, things were this way. It’s just terribly ironic to know we were silently desperate for each other. »

Between wonder and sadness. Nothing they wished to live again and yet it was quite curious. Again, all this was over and solved, they could be happy together.

« Sounds a bit dumb, gotta admit. Damn, all this time crying for dying alone while you were surely getting sick over me. That’s…stupid but so sad too. »

« It’s over now, I got you and I won’t let you go unless you want me to. » A kiss was needed right then, a proof of the burning passion that had guided them both in their solitudes before. Yi wanted to make it right, to show that all this could be forgotten now that they got each other.

Yasuo reacted all so well under his ardent exchange, clinging to him with strength on reflex or not. He urged more and more, until Yi was on top of him while he chased that sweet mouth. This new safety.

When air became too important and they had to break the kiss, Yasuo sported such a deep blush, it went really well with his carelessness, disheveled in bed. He was perfect, everything that Yi craved and more. Only words could end him properly.

« Don’t ever think about letting go. » Hands around his face in blushing determination, only to prepare for these blessed words : « I love you. »

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright, i'll try to wrap it up before the 20 chapters xD  
> sorry for the light feels~


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright!   
> hopefully this one will be one of the last xD   
> (also i didn't have the faith to write my usual cycle so here is a second update)
> 
> thanks for staying that long!

_« And I love you too, Yasuo. Always. »_

Sweet words for a sweet boyfriend that had clung to him afterward without a single break. In fact Yasuo had kept their embrace even after Yone got back and called for them just to check. The kind of embrace Yi wouldn’t be able to live without anymore. Such strength in feelings.

In the end their cuddles had last at least one hour, speant leisurly in Yi’s bed in the comfy mood close to a nap. After such high emotions in this unplaned discussion, all went well and they fell again in that new cycle of blushing affection and dear laughs. Personally Yi loved it, special time in private with the latter. Yasuo seemed to enjoy himself too, snuggled up to him like a cat for a good nap. It had been a little sudden in honest sadness but this was out of the way, they had resumed their love as quick.

Yi tried his best to take as many details to engrave in his memories. Everything was worth it, from Yasuo’s mischievous glance before he got on top for more kisses or the rare vulnerability showed when he let Yi take a curious look at the now rare flowers.

At the occasion he had learned a few things about it. First, Yasuo’s flowers were snowdrops. A bit stupid not to have known earlier but for a long time the latter had kept every single petal away from sight, because that was his own problem per his words.

Yi remained quite curious about these flowers since it was said the flowers could help to guess who was the target of such love. Probably useless because the ‘victim’ of hanahaki already knew too well who they were dying for. In any case, Yasuo didn’t seem so scared about these small white flowers that had made his life hell for a few months. Technically it was part of him, a side of him.

_These can be quite beautiful. Out of context_. Knowing the reason these flowers were here, Yi didn’t really like these in particular but snowdrops in general were indeed of his favorites. Discreet and resistant flower. Sad it had been bound to Yasuo’s sickness.

And now he was thinking about flowers without reason. Busy brushing his teeth, Yi wanted to hurry a little to join the latter at last. Sleep time indeed.

After that dear cuddle session, a chill evening and equally good dinner, it was time to go to bed. It wasn’t that late for a Friday night but Yasuo wasn’t exactly out of the woods, he still needed a good rest. So much that he had simply fallen asleep a few time on the couch while he, Yone and Yi were watching a movie, the safest activity instead of going out.

The movie over, Yi had gone to brush his teeth before going back to either wake Yasuo up or carry him to bed. He didn’t know yet, this could be difficult. _We will try to wake him up, it’s safer._

Back to the living room, Yone was still here poking gently his brother to see if indeed he was deep asleep or not. It didn’t look too deep since after a few gentle shakes Yasuo did wake up, eyes open.

« What you want…. ? » Low grumble, not really awake it would seem.

Yi just arrived, returning by his boyfriend’s side on reflex. After that short absence it had created a little empty space where Yasuo had been holding him in his sleep. As if it wasn’t clear enough, Yasuo fumbled a little before realizing his sweet love wasn’t where he thought he was. Oh, cute. This small scene happened under Yone’s eyes but he was far too nice and understanding not to make fun of his brother right now.

« Hey Yas, it’s sleep time. »

Not far, Yi spoke too since it seemed to be the only thing able to keep Yasuo awake with some focus : « Yes dear, let’s go to bed. Together. »

Before he was even finished Yasuo had returned to their default embrace, the smallest of contact. On the instant Yi thought that he might try to kiss him, maybe a little unaware of his surroundings and especially his brother just next to them. Surely this wouldn’t be an issue but Yasuo could get really clingy and affectionate, no need to know how far he would go if he believed to be in his bedroom safety.

« Oh, alright. Help me baby ? »

Ah that amused gaze from Yone. Yi noticed, of course. _Well, that’s how it is_. No need to hide. Instead he embraced Yasuo and pulled him to his feet, always maintaining contact in case he wasn’t stable.

« Fine ? Hold on to me, just a little longer. » Close whisper, no idea why. Yi was all so quick to fall into that soft tone around Yasuo. Just a last word to Yone, since their ways would part : « I think we’re good. Sleep well. »

Small waving and there he and Yasuo went to his bedroom, a bit slowly but they made it. Yi remained quite careful, he wasn’t exactly carrying the latter but it would be better not to bump into anything. Surely Yasuo had little awareness of anything around him at the moment, close to doze over him.

At last inside his bedroom, Yi took him to bed and took care not to let him collapse on the mattress violently. Considering the way Yasuo moved alike a dead weight, this was better for him.

« Yi… ? » Breathy, sleepy. A simple call in this bedroom and a gesture toward him, lying in bed.

« I’m here, love, I’m here. »

Yi had to be quick, he doubted Yasuo would stay awake long enough for him to cuddle a little and say goodnight. In time he cut all the light and joined the latter in bed, worried hands over him on reflex.

« Hey, still here… ? »He preferred to murmur, just in case.

In the dark it was difficult to find Yasuo’s face but he managed in not a lot of time, waiting for an answer.

« Mmmh…. » Barely voiced and completely incoherent but it was enough.

« Good night. I love you. » This had to be said, at least for Yi’s heart. The second night together and yet it felt like the first.

No time lost on either sides, both embraced each other quite close, the only difference being in the strenght and speed of moves. Indeed Yasuo seemed more than tired. _Maybe the beer tonight wasn’t a good idea_. Anyway, they would have to see next morning if it was really a bad idea. For now it was sleep time, limbs tangled as they seeked warmth.

Then Yi heard it, a few muffled words against his chest.

« Love you… »

_Awwww…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> damn i'm so tired xD  
> soon the horny will show up! be ready!


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!!  
> yes, another update, i'm not in my usual setting and this fluff is easy with inspiration xD
> 
> thanks for reading!!

Light falling across his face, directly from the window. _Fuck_. Yasuo’s reflex was to roll over, trying to escape this piercing light far too early for him. Although this move wasn’t so possible since he was in Yi’s arms, keeping him from going away. _Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww_. There went his heart, aching sweetly for remembering the latest day.

Changing of tactic, Yasuo chose instead to go a little further in bed and hold the latter against him. Maybe like this both wouldn’t be too bothered by the sun.

All this was done while he kept his eyes closed, hoping everything dear that he would still be able to fall asleep afterward. This was Saturday after all, weekend. _Hell yeah…_ This meant free time with Yi, all for him.

Overall the move went rather well, no problems came up because he was more than cautious. It would be stupid to wake Yi up on accident. Now Yasuo relaxed back in bed, settling for good with his boyfriend in his arms, snuggled up to him. _Perfect_. A small peck to Yi’s head then he could be happy.

There was still some stirring in their embrace after this very light agitation. _Hmm ?_ Yasuo paid attention, to be sure he hadn’t caused anything terrible. Obviously not, Yi merely moved in his sleep to adapt in that new position and close distance, as if it wasn’t already. A sleepy sigh escaped him, enough for Yasuo to melt from an excess of affection. _He’s so cute…_ In return he clung a little to Yi, in the self limits he put to prevent any interruption. This was going to be fine.

At least he hoped.

Some minutes later he wasn’t back to sleep yet and on the opposite it felt like he was more awake than before. Too bad for him, now he was really awake. _Rahhhhh…_ That wasn’t funny at all, for once he got a lot of time to sleep – without taking in time the week with no classes – and he couldn’t even join Yi in that blessed rest.

Well, things couldn’t be forced. As much as it annoyed him, Yasuo thought it might give them an occasion to nap together in the afternoon. If Yi didn’t have anything more important to do. _I should ask when he’s awake_.

A nap, nothing better than that, except sex maybe. _Mmmmh_ , I wish. How long should he wait before asking ? Yasuo was both very desperate sometimes but also rather scared to bother Yi with that. Surely jumping on him after barely a whole day together wasn’t the best.

_Ahhhh…_ Life was complex sometimes. At least he could be glad not to be dying anymore. Yasuo would have to check that it was truly gone with his doctor later but this could almsot be considered over. No pain, no coughing, no heartache over feelings.

These same feelings made him come back to Yi’s level, resisting hard to shower him with his affection. It could get so powerful sometimes when he thought about what he had believed to be out of reach and it fact it was. Yi had believed the same. _My darling_.

Now Yasuo faced him, trying his damnest not to be too fast or far in his light attention. Barely brushing Yi’s cheek he looked at him. So handsome, especially from so close. To be right there was such a privilege in his mind, Yasuo could be giving a few tears about it. _Gorgeous_. Was it normal to be so much in love ? To have his heart racing just from a good eyeful of this beautiful man he was allowed to call his ?

_I want to kiss him…_ Soon he would surrender, this was torture to be awake, only to witness such sweet moment. Yi was just sleeping, nothing to be so amazed. And yet it gave a moment to look and feel love well up.

The only thing that changed this plan was Yi’s move in his sleep, slowly getting away before settling back for more. _Oh no…_ Nothing too tragic at least. Just now the latter wasn’t facing Yasuo anymore now that he completely lied back instead of his side. Well, he would survive it.

To be at peace Yasuo closed distance again, an arm over the latter while he returned to his favorite thing, curl up against Yi. All good.

It would be a shame if he had to cough right now. Life could be mean too. It seized Yasuo before he even remembered about it, sudden fit impossible to repress. On the moment it still stung faintly but it was greatly diminished since the days before, when he was close to taste blood. That was truly awful and he was glad it was past.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck_.

Clearly he had been loud, no way to ignore that. When he tried to put the unique flower he got from it away, something made him stop. Someone. A slow but strong pull to Yi, impossible to refuse and dodge. It just took Yasuo by surprise since he didn’t know the latter to be awake. However, after such noise, it was a real coinflip. _Well, shit_.

Without questions he went with the move until he was pressed fully to his boyfriend. Despite the circumstance Yasuo was very glad to be held. As to prove anything, Yi opened his eyes, which revealed a very curious and soft gaze. Absolutely lovely. Yasuo could get lost in it.

« Aye, hello baby…Sorry about the noise. » Not very proud of himself in that moment indeed. Yasuo still tried to give his affection now that it didn’t risk to wake the latter anymore.

« All good, don’t worry. Does it hurt ? » Oh his voice sounded so sleepy.

_Adorable…_

« Nah, it’s just noisy. Mmmmh missed you darling…. »

« I’m still here, dear. I won’t leave. » Yi checked his phone, surely for the time, before he resumed their embrace and caressed him gently. « Ah it’s a bit late. »

« It’s only 11, not even time for lunch. More cuddles… ? » Secret hope. Yasuo knew he always got up a lot earlier than him so he had to be convincing.

« Of course, as much as you want. My only request is a kiss, please. »

Definitely everything was sweet when it came from Yi. Right now he gazed tenderly at Yasuo, making him cry in his mind for being right there, surrounded by love.

« Y-Yes please. »

Who really needed that between the two ? In any case it was gladly given and received, making Yasuo keen lowly when the latter kissed him with obvious eagerness. Early feelings were always so kind. Overwhelmed, Yasuo let go of his control, too happy to even think. The weekend started more than well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter i'll try to end it! and then smut time!!


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT'S TIME  
> last update (of the sfw part)!!
> 
> thank you for staying till the 'end'! <3

_Delightful_.

Barely awake and Yi already knew this day was worth it. Nothing better than a good kiss to start a day right off, especially this one. Sweet Saturday morning, all the time in the world to relax and enjoy company.

By his side Yasuo was so warm and cuddly, perfect. Not a single second lost without any contact, they held each other closely while the kiss last. It would never be enough.

Little by little they learned more about each other, about details and reactions to specific gestures. Now Yi could safely say that the latter would get all clingy when he caressed his hair. It was always so cute to feel Yasuo open up – first or second – into the kiss with the same need for more, begging in gestures and light brush over skin. _Don’t be so shy…_ That was a curious thing indeed, probably temporary. A remain of Yasuo’s struggle over months of unrequited feelings, when it wasn’t proved yet. Curious because Yi had always known him to be out-going, talkative and more than friendly with anyone. Not the shy type. This was something he just discovered, either it was due to the fear of being rejected or it was just the way Yasuo behaved around him.

To be honest, Yi was aware he didn’t behave exactly the same around Yasuo than with anyone else, even Yone. Of course, that was quite logical, he would be all loving in that romantic sense only with Yasuo. The truth was elsewhere. Even before he sort of already knew he liked him – even in a different way than their now relationship – but it had only become tangible after confession. Like affection building up secretly, waiting to be given once the time had come. For having literally watched Yasuo get more and more sick over an unknown person, it had only pushed him to suppress everything. Until now. They were free, Yi was free to give everything to this man he had grown to love with time. The one now a little breathless after that lasting kiss.

« Take care, don’t hurt yourself for nothing. » The remark turned soft because of his tone, greatly touched by the mood. No way to be mad right now when Yasuo looked at him like a thing of beauty.

« Nah, completely worth it. That’s my medecine~ » With that he kissed Yi again, barely the time to breathe before he took more of that tenderness.

_That’s so sweet…_ Yi knew it wasn’t helping in itself but without a doubt their early affection still played a huge part in Yasuo’s recovery. If feelings could hurt and make sick then feelings could soothe and heal. At least that specific case.

In no time they were back to this gentle exchange, opening up to each other. By now it wasn’t really chaste, such thorough attention was the kind to lead to more. Yi registered that slow change when hands travelled a little over him, from cuddling to exploring. _Oh ?_ All this was still very innocent, nothing obscene or just heated. Both of them were clothed, it was still winter.

So he let it happen, more than happy to relax in bed and coaxing Yasuo a little further. After all they had to go through, Yi preferred to show everything was fine and more than that, welcome. A hand to Yasuo’s nape, he encouraged him and after they parted, he gave a few sweet words.

Oh the impact of little nothings. It almost surprised Yi to realize that, each time he saw the latter blushing lightly after affection in words or gestures. _It’s not that much_. Was it ? Thinking about the reverse side, of course he enjoyed every word Yasuo ever dedicated to him. Each time he sounded so relieved to be there, a bit disbelieving to be loved in such way. This second waking together was like a dream come true.

« I love you. » Say it, again and again until one day Yasuo got it clear and loud. Until then Yi would repeat and thinking again, he knew he wouldn’t ever stop. That reaction made it too precious.

What Yi didn’t expect was to actually see the latter cry. _Wait no…_ Barely a few tears that trailed down Yasuo’s face after an obvious effort to hold this back.

« Ahh…I didn’t mean to… » Was it goor or bad ? Yi had no idea so he surrended to the urge to help and soothe. There came light panic.

_No no no…_

Frozen on top of him for a few seconds and still caught in that shortcircuit, Yasuo reacted soon enough by kissing him suddenly. The opposite of all the previous kisses of that morning, this one was hard and desperate, the kind of claim made to check reality. It had to be real or they wouldn’t be breathless and clinging to each other with such urgency.

It was broken almost as quick, only for Yasuo to hide back in his favorite spot, nuzzling Yi’s neck. Completely lying down on him, a bit tense. _Alright, alright_. All this was a little difficult to keep track, a bit dazzed after such strong emotions at once.

When everything calmed down – as showed the gentle kisses pressed to his neck and jaw – Yi sighed and resumed his needed contact, rubbing the latter’s back. Really sometimes it could be a lot to process at once. Far from him to complain, this was lovely. At least it was clear everything was fine and Yasuo just needed time to come in term with his urges and feelings.

« I love you too, Yi. So so much…My honey darling…My everything… » Every sentence was punctuated by another peck, another short attention that added to the rest to make something wonderful.

Hearing that made it extremely understandable that Yasuo would give a few tears. It was so nice and kind, like when Yasuo was too tired by the end of the day but still grinned softly. Yi wanted to keep everything.

This was just the beginning, may their future together be full of affection.

_I hope so. My dear love…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy the fluff isn't over!  
> Surely in the week (after a full cycle of my usual updates) I'll start the smutty part of this story. Be ready, it gonna be hot and sweet <3

**Author's Note:**

> This fanfic will be updated in my usual cycle so next update will probably come in five or six days!
> 
> Till then, you can still find me there to chat or else :  
> > twitter: @niceswordboots  
> > tumblr: https://aracdo.tumblr.com/


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